


For your eyes only

by annabsn



Category: One Direction (Band)
Genre: Domestic Fluff, Endgame Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson, Fluff and Smut, Football | Soccer Player Louis Tomlinson, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Friendship/Love, Harry Styles Loves Louis Tomlinson, High School, M/M, Niall Horan & Harry Styles Friendship, Photographer Louis Tomlinson, Slow Burn, Song: If I Could Fly (One Direction), Top Louis Tomlinson, Writer Harry, harry is already whipped, louis’ family is complicated
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-27
Updated: 2021-03-08
Packaged: 2021-03-10 20:53:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 29,179
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28363470
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/annabsn/pseuds/annabsn
Summary: "If someone wrote a song for me, I would feel like the luckiest person in the world".Harry makes a mental note to write a song for Louis if they are ever going to be together, which will never happen, but sometimes he likes to think so.Before he falls asleep, he makes another mental note to write one for him anyway.Or; the one where Harry Styles loves to write and has a crush on Louis Tomlinson, a boy who plays football and knows what love is, but maybe just needs to learn how to love again.
Relationships: Harry Styles/Louis Tomlinson
Comments: 9
Kudos: 52





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone, I wrote this story first in Italian because it's my first language but wanted to translate it into English as well.  
> Italian school system is totally different so I did some researches and I hope it's correct (to make it easier, Louis is in his last year of school before University and Harry is one year younger).  
> Not a enemies to lovers I’m sorry, more a friends to lovers, it’s going to be a slow burn (I guess), so if you want, give it a try :)  
> You can find the italian translation on wattpad on my profile @annastiinskii, thank you for being here and enjoy your reading!

The love story between Harry Styles and Louis Tomlinson doesn't really starts here, but I think it's worth informing you of a few things before we begin. Let's start from that day, _the day of Zayn's party_ , their first meeting.

* * *

"Jesus Harry, what kind of bullshit is this. She will never believe it". Niall rolls his eyes, he means it, but Harry laughs so hard he has to cover his mouth with his hand. Their teacher is late, she's never late, but Harry doesn't mind. "Are you free today?".

"Yeah, like always, can we stay at your place?", Harry starts taking his books out of his bag, their teacher is still missing, but he's the only one who hasn't pulled them out yet. Niall is looking at him impatiently, waiting for an answer. "’Course, Gemma won't be home anyway, I think".

"Oh, things are getting hot", Niall raises his eyebrows more than once before bursting out laughing, followed by Harry. "You know, sometimes I wonder why we're still friends, Niall".

"I know the answer, it's because I'm the only one who can stand your stupid ass, Styles". Harry wants to answer back, but the sound of a bell interrupts his thoughts, and the room is filled with silence a moment later.

"It's a fire alarm kids, please get in line and get out of school". _Again_. The two boys roll their eyes as the whole class stand up. It's not that they don't take these things seriously, but it’s the third fire test of the week. Their class know where to go once they got outside and, once the gym teacher -their history teacher is still missing- has signed that everyone is present, Harry starts to look around. He already knows what his eyes are looking for.

His gaze travels around the green garden of their school, where at least 15 other classes are gathered, some are still making sure that everyone is present, other classes have sat down at the lunch tables that you can find around the garden and which in May, when the sun starts to get hot and being outside is better than staying inside, are a popular destination for everyone.

He finds his sister's classroom, and his eyes light up a little, because there he is.  Louis Tomlinson.

Louis Tomlinson is like, _that_ feeling, when you are able to go to the beach and put your feet in the sand after months of winter.

Yeah. Louis is something like that.

Harry inevitably smiles when he sees him talking to some of his friends whom Harry know just by name.

Louis is probably the prettiest boy Harry has ever seen, he thought that the first time he saw him. And now, two years later, he still think that Louis is the prettiest guy he has ever seen.

The concept of _beauty_ isn't a simple thing for Harry to explain. Beauty is subjective, of course, but he is sure Louis is perfect to describe it. Harry watches him, and there is no trace of imperfections on his skin, not when he arrives at school sleepy in the morning, nor when he finishes a football match and he has sweat on his forehead. Beauty isn't synonym of perfection, he knows that, but when Louis' eyelashes catch the sun and the blue of his eyes shines, Harry can swear that he has never seen anything more beautiful.

The first time he saw him, Harry was outside school with Niall, it was the last days of school and no one was really paying attention to lessons anymore, everyone just wanted to go home at the end of the day and that day Harry was tired, like, really tired. He was walking into the parking lot with Niall after the last class was over, and he saw Louis for the first time. He didn't even realize he had stopped walking until Niall raised an hand in front of his face.

From that day, he couldn't stop thinking about the boy with blue eyes. That kind of beauty, in Louis's blue eyes and in the way he acts, when he runs around the football field or the way he leans against his locker, Harry has never seen it in anyone else. And he's maybe a little ridiculous, but Harry knows that it's just one of those crushes that everyone has in high school, one that even ten years later will be a positive thought. That crush that you have but don't have at the same time, you know?

It can be said that Harry and Louis aren't complete strangers, they spoke once after a football match. When school started again and Harry saw Louis after the summer break, he realised that the boy was really stuck in his mind, so he tried to spoke to him after a match. Anyway, that’s the only time they have ever spoken to each other.

Sure they aren't friends, they don't greet each other in the hallways at school or at the mall, but for Harry it’s enough that Louis knows his name. Or at least, he hopes he still remembers it.

"Hey" a hand is waved in front of his face, putting an end to his thoughts about the blue-eyed boy. "Is everything okay, mate?".

Harry doesn't know anything about Zayn, just his name, although they have had several classes together since the first year of school, they have never spoken to each other though. Harry also knows that Zayn is Louis' best friend, but he doesn't know anything else about the boy who is standing in front of him.

"We're going inside," Zayn looks at the door they came out of a few minutes earlier, "are you coming or?". Harry nods, after looking around and seeing that the reason he was lost in his thoughts is already gone.

Actually, their history teacher is really missing today, so their gym teacher decides to stay with them, there are less than 20 minutes to go before lunchtime. She is looking at her phone, keeping her feet on the desk while her back is against the chair. Harry looks at her, not sure that she can sit like that in class, but then again, it's none of his business, so he goes back to talking to Niall.

Harry is actually very hungry, so when the bell rings he smiles, getting up and heading towards the school canteen with his best friend beside him. They sit at the first free table they find, it doesn't really matter which one.

"I can't fucking wait for the party tonight".

"Yeah, I know Niall, you've been talking about that party for 2 weeks" Harry sighs and runs a hand through his hair, his curls are softer than usual, strangely free and without a trace of hair gel in them.

It's not that he doesn't like parties, he doesn't like loud noises, that's all. And he doesn't like the idea of going to the house of someone he has only spoken to twice in over three years.

"I heard that Zayn has a really big house, it wouldn't be that surprising if we found the whole school at that party". Harry sighs again, rolling his eyes, but this time he tries to fake a smile. "C'mon Harry, Louis will be there too, why don't you try to talk to him?".

"Niall," Harry looks around before removing his hand from Niall's mouth, he covered it at the exact moment Niall finished saying the last word, "what the hell? There are too many people around us. People can hear you". He says the last words, articulating them, as if he’s explaining to a three-year-old how to say 'mum'.

"Sorry" Niall runs a hand through his hair, "You're literally a pain in the ass, not gonna lie".

"Thanks" Harry rolls his eyes again, but a moment later he is enjoying his best friend's laugh. Niall raises his middle finger, and Harry does the same before looking away.

Without even realizing it, he feels some kind of jealousy when he sees a couple kissing near their table. Anyway. He turns his attention to the noises coming from the football team's table, which fortunately is far away from him and Niall.

Everything around the school canteen is _noisy_ , and that is annoying Harry. Screams, loud sounds. Noises annoy him.

He looks around the whole room, not looking for anything in particular, until his eyes meet a pair of blue ones. And if we want to be honest, he was searching for them ever since he started looking around.

They're the same blue as a necklace he has at home and always wore when he was younger. He doesn't wear it anymore now, but he still remembers the day he and Gemma found it in his mother's jewellery and Harry was fascinated, looking at the blue of the pendant.

He forgets to chew his sandwich when his eyes meet Louis'. He doesn't know how to explain how much he likes his eyes. Louis keeps looking at him, and Harry doesn't even realize how long he has been keeping the eye contact with him, but he hopes his cheeks aren't red, even though they feel hot.

Niall's voice bring him back to reality, and Harry starts doubting if what has already happened really happened or if he was just dreaming. His best friend is repeating the timetable of the night for the hundredth time, and Harry is thinking how to make him shut up. Instead, he kisses his forehead and Niall smiles softly at him.

They both go back to their sandwiches in silence, Harry looks again at where Louis is sitting, he cannot help but smile as he watches him take a bite out of his sandwich, not because Louis eats differently from everyone else, but Harry simply thinks he looks good doing everything. He's talking to his two best friends Zayn and Liam, and with a group of people who have stopped at their table, of whom Harry recognizes only a few of Louis' teammates and a girl.

Eleanor and Louis have been together several months the year before, and they broke up a few weeks before school started. Louis has only had one girlfriend based on what Harry knows, Eleanor.

He would be lying if he says he hadn't spent hours looking at her pictures on instagram the year before, somehow wishing he was her. Sometimes he wondered if she knew she had been with the best guy in the world. He believed so, and he wished he was lucky enough to be with Louis, touch him, kiss him, make love to him.

Exaggerate. Sometimes Harry likes to travel with the imagination and exaggerate.

"Jesus, can you stop staring at him? It's creepy", Niall laughs and Harry finds himself blushing, making a mental note to stop thinking too much about Louis and to focus more on real life.

The two boys get up from their table and Niall throws their garbage away as they reach the garbage can. "I wasn't even looking at him", Niall nods, before disappearing, Harry follows him a second later, but first he looks at Louis for the last time.

•••••

_Breaths._   
_A lot of breaths._   
_And bodies, a lot of bodies._   
_Black, alternated with yellow, red, green, blue._   
_Bodies touching other bodies._   
_And lights, lights, a lot of lights._

_Louis._   
_Louis is smiling at him._   
_Does Louis know how much he loves his smile?_   
_He loves his smile like a child loves chocolate._   
_He loves his lips._   
_Does Louis know how much he loves his lips?_   
_He knows._   
_He knows he wants to touch every single part of his body._

_Lights, lights, lights, again._   
_"Do you want another one?"_   
_Yes._   
_3, 4, 5 shots._   
_Liquids with names he doesn't even know._

_And Louis, again._

_Their bodies are touching each other._   
_He's touching Louis._   
_Louis is touching him._   
_And he wants Louis._   
_He needs him._

_And then, their lips meet._   
_He kisses every part of Louis' mouth._   
_He wants every part of his body._   
_Fuck, he's kissing Louis Tomlinson._

_Lights, bodies, again._   
_Shots._   
_He wants Louis again._   
_He kisses him again._   
_Other breaths._   
_Too many breaths._   
_He breaks the kiss even if he wants him._   
_Again, again, again._   
_Everything about him, he wants everything._

"Harry", some arms wrapped around his little body carry him away from were he is standing. "I'll take you in my room".

_Lights, lights, lights._   
_No._   
_He wants to kiss Louis again._   
_Just one more time._

Harry can't feel his legs but he can feel the same arms from earlier carrying him upstairs.

_Nonono._   
_He wants Louis again._   
_Just one more time tonight._

"Stay there and sleep, okay?". He does so, he falls asleep in the exact moment his body touches the bed. Zayn turns off the lights and leaves Harry alone in the room.

•••••

Harry wakes up in a bed that isn't his. He looks around for a clock, maybe he is in Zayn's bedroom, there are pictures of him and other people pinned to the wall, and it's 3.07 am. Yes, it’s Zayn’s bedroom. He tries to remember how he get there, the room is nice, it has green walls and it's bigger than Harry's, it’s really pretty.

Anyway, he stops thinking about that when he feels the vomit in his throat. He tries to think about the night while he's throwing up, but he can't remember anything, only that he drank, and now he feels miserable, so maybe he drank too much. When he is finally done, he washes his face and tries to fix his hair, looking at his reflection in the mirror he only hopes to disappear.

That doesn't happen, unfortunately.

The party downstairs is still going on and the only thing Harry wants to do is throw himself back in bed. When he gets out of the bathroom he thanks God that the light is off, he can see where the bed is only because the light coming from the window is lighting the whole room. He doesn't know if the moon is full tonight, but the white light of the room comes from it.

He buries his face in the pillow as soon as his body touches the sheets, the spot of the bed where he slept until a few minutes before still has the imprint of his body. He's taking deep breaths against the pillow, he smells like alcohol, and the cologne he put on before the party luckily isn't completely gone. At least he can't smell the vomit.

He hears the door open probably ten minutes after he has thrown himself back into bed, he doesn't know who the person is, probably it's just Zayn looking if he is dead or alive. Pretending to sleep seems the best thing to do. He hears the click of the light switch, and then someone whispers a little "Oh shit".

No.

Harry can recognize that voice anywhere, but _he can't be there._ He can't be there, right?

 _Wrong_.

"I thought there was no one, I can leave if you want". Harry shakes his head way to fast for someone who has just stopped purging, "No, it's okay, stay. I was just lying here, well, you can stay and I can leave. Or, I don't know. Okay, I'll leave".

Silence fills the room after that, in the background Harry can hear the music coming from downstairs, and they just stare at each other without saying anything. Harry tries to get up, but something like an hand against his chest put him down and he finds himself sitting on the bed again.

"Are you okay?", Louis finally speaks up after several seconds of silence, Harry thinks that maybe there's genuine concern in his eyes when Louis put an hand on his shoulder and Harry can see his eyes close to his face. "Yeah, I'm fine, it’s just, my head is spinning a little".

"I can call your girlfriend if you want".

Harry shakes his head, wrong decision again, "I don't have a girlfriend".

"I can find the girl that was with you earlier".

"I was with my best friend, but you don't need to call him. I'm fine". Louis looks at him more confused than he already was, and Harry is pretty sure that he's looking at him with the same confusion in his eyes.

"Fine mate, but there was a girl, and you guys were kissing”, he smiles, “Maybe you were just too drunk to remember. It's okay".

Oh.

Harry kissed someone tonight. He remembers now. But, he kissed Louis, right?

Wrong, again.

"I thought- Nothing, I just thought I was kissing someone else".

"Well, the positive thing is that you snogged someone, yeah?".

_God please, tell me this is just a nightmare._

Louis sits down next to him, grabs his phone and moves his hands to tip something before turning around and lying down on the bed where Harry was sitting until 5 minutes earlier. He seems to have forgotten about Harry, and the curly doesn't know what to do honestly, but when he tries to get up he feels Louis' hand on his wrist.

"Sorry, I'm Louis by the way" he reaches out his hand to Harry, "we talked once a few months ago, I don’t know if you remember".

Harry finds himself sitting down in the bed again, "I remember".

Did he really just ask Harry if he remembers? Harry, who thinks about that moment every day, could he have forgotten? _Crazy_.

He shakes his hand anyway, "I'm Harry".

Louis lies down again, totally uninterested in continuing the conversation, Harry is still sitting in the same spot of the bed, but now he's facing Louis, who has his eyes closed.

He wonders for a moment if Louis would bother if he lies down with him, but Harry was there first, right? Louis arrived after him, and he wants to sleep, so he decides to do it anyway and lies down next to Louis. He closes his eyes at the exact moment his body touches the sheets of Zayn's bed again. He stays there, listening to their breaths and the music in the background, he just wants to fall asleep and hopes that Louis hasn't found him too weird.

Clearly he's wrong because he feels Louis move next to him, and he hopes with all his heart that he isn't getting up to leave.

He breathes a sigh of relief in his mind when he opens his eyes and sees Louis still in the bed, now facing him. Harry decides to do the same, and, oh. He realises how close their bodies are.

He wonders if Louis drank too much tonight too. Maybe he'll forget about their conversation the next day, and everything will return to normal. Louis would go back to his normal life without Harry, and Harry would go back to his normal life without Louis, but somehow full of thoughts about Louis.

"You are the same age as Liam and Zayn, right?" Harry nods.

"And you're Gemma's brother", he nods again.

Louis and Gemma are the same age and they know each other, one of the reasons why Harry has never talked with her about his crush for Louis.

"Anything else about you?".

Harry looses his mind in Louis' eyes for a moment, they are beautiful, and he doesn’t understand the question at first for that. He loves the fact that he can look into Louis' eyes so closely.

"There's nothing important to know".

Louis rolls his eyes, "Should I believe that?".

"I really like your eyes".

 _God_.

Louis looks at him in embarrassment for a second before looking away, Harry wishes he could slap himself for making Louis uncomfortable. Instead of doing it, he tries to change the subject, "Why are you here if there's a party downstairs?".

" _Touché_. I'm completely sober right now and I can go home if I want, but I don't want to, so I came here. You know, it’s my best friend’s room".

”Oh, right. Sorry if I’m here, I guess Zayn took me here, I think I should leave now”.

”God Harry,” Louis looks down, smiling a little. He never smiles, is Harry making him smile? “you’re kinda, uhm, peculiar, you know that?”.

”Am I?”. Of course he is.

Harry laughs, _peculiar,_ the word is funny. The alcohol probably makes it even funnier.

"Why don't you want to go home?".

"I've known you for 5 minutes and I already have to tell you my secrets?" Harry shakes his head, Louis doesn't have to tell him anything, he doesn't want to make him feel uncomfortable again.

Louis laughs instead, "I'm just kidding, Harry, but promise you won't tell anyone?", he pulls out his pinkie and motions for Harry to do the same, they cross their pinkies together after Harry swore not to tell anyone. Just that little touch causes sparks in his body.

"I'm scared of thunderstorms and I don't like to drive under the rain".

That’s it. Harry's attention returns back to reality and he watches outside the window, he didn’t even notice that there is a thunderstorm outside, "Why don't you want people to know?".

"Because, I don't want them to ask me the reason". Harry nods, Louis doesn't want to say anything else about the subject, he's dying to know more, but he just nods. Louis smiles at him embarrassed, it's the fourth time he smiles since he entered Zayn's room, Harry has counted. Maybe it's the first time he smile tonight. But Harry can't know that, because his memories aren't that truthful, but during the time he spent looking at Louis when he was sober, he never saw him smiling.

"Your turn now Harry, tell me a secret about you" Louis pulls out his pinkie again, Harry feels the same sparks as before, same thoughts as before, same desire to kiss him as before.

"I really like writing".

"And why is it a secret?".

"I'm ashamed". It's true, no other reasons come to his mind, he never even told Niall, or Gemma.

"You are ashamed because you write porno stories?". That comment makes Harry laugh a lot for no reason, alcohol again. Louis doesn't join him, but he smiles again. His lips are thin, thinner than Harry's, and his smile is beautiful, more beautiful than Harry's.

"What do you write?".

"Everything I want to, I like to write things that cross my mind, sometimes just thought and sometimes I write songs".

"My God, what a fucking romantic are you Harry".

"I'm not!". He is.

"I wonder how many people are in love with you".

Harry smiles, because Louis said 'people' without specifying the gender. He doesn't like to define his sexuality, and he doesn't like other people doing it either.

"If someone wrote a song for me, I would feel like the luckiest person in the world".

Harry makes a mental note to write a song for Louis if they are ever going to be together, which will never happen, but sometimes he likes to think so.

Before he falls asleep, he makes another mental note to write one for him anyway.


	2. Chapter 2

_If I could fly, I'd be coming right back home to you._   
_I think I might give up everything, just ask me to_

"Harry".

Zayn squeezes Harry's arm for the fifth time. When the curly finally opens his eyes, he finds in front of his face the boy whose bed he stole that night sitting where Louis had been the night before, and the thought of having slept in the same bed with Louis takes his attention away from Zayn again.

"Hi Zayn," he sits up, running an hand through his hair, "sorry if I stole your bed tonight".

"No problem Harry, I slept in my sister's room. Anyway, how are you feeling this morning?". The night before it was Zayn who took him to his bedroom, and Harry hasn't had a chance to thank him yet. "I'm fine. Thank you for last night, I didn't mean to ruin your party".

Zayn runs a hand through his curls, Harry doesn't mind people doing that, unless his hair is fixed with gel. "You didn't ruin anything, Liam and Niall were in the same conditions as you, maybe worse. They're downstairs right now if you want to join them, I'll be there too in 5 minutes".

"Niall's here?".

"Yeah, he and Liam were too drunk last night so I let them stay here, Louis is downstairs too". Harry nods before leaving the room, the night before he hadn't even noticed how many rooms Zayn's house has. Niall was right when he said that his house was big.

He sees Louis as soon as he enters the kitchen, he's wearing a hoodie way too long for him and a pair of sweatpants way too big for him, probably both of the things are Zayn's. "'Morning", Harry moves his attention to Louis' face when he hears his voce. He wonders if it's humanly possible to be as beautiful as Louis at that time of the morning. There isn't the slightest trace of sleep in his eyes, unlike Harry, who took a quick look at his reflection in the hall mirror and looked like he hadn't slept in weeks.

"Harry,", Niall appears from nowhere a second later, the curly smiles at him "good morning".

"Hey Ni, you okay?" the blonde returns his smile, "A bit of a headache, but I'm fine". He points at Louis with his head, who is standing in front of the cooker, fortunately with his back turned, before disappearing into the living room and sitting down on the couch next to Liam, who waves at Harry from the other room.

"How are you feeling this morning?", Louis turns his attention to Harry for a second before returning to the pancakes he's cooking, there is a little bit of sarcasm in his voice.

"I'm fine, thank you". Louis keeps cooking his pancakes, and Harry just stand there in the doorway. He doesn't know what to do, whether to go with the others or try to have a decent conversation with Louis to make up the one they had the night before.

"Are you scared to come in?".

Harry shakes his head, his long legs manage to bring him almost to Louis' side, in front of the cooker. The older boy smirks when he sees Harry approaching him, maybe he likes to see Harry scared, the curly finds no other explanation.

"Uhm," Louis moves away from the cooker for a moment, running his hands over the kitchen cabinets until he stops in front of the last one and pulls out a small box that Harry guesses is of pills. He sets it down on the counter and pours a glass of water, pointing at it with his head to Harry, who grabs the box and reads 'for headaches'.

"Thank you”. Louis simply nods as Harry swallows one of the pills, helping himself with the glass of water. "Uhm, I wanted to apologise for last night. I don't usually drink that much”.

"Well, I’m not your mother? You have nothing to apologize for". The only pancakes Louis has made so far are all already burnt, he seems struggling actually, so it comes naturally to Harry to ask "Do you need help?". Louis answers him by moving away from the cooker and sitting down. Harry likes to cook, pancakes are actually easy for him since he's used to making them almost every morning for Gemma, so it doesn't take him that long to take over the situation at the cooker.

"Do you know Zayn well?", Louis is the first to break the silence after a few minutes, Harry thanks him in his mind, because the silence was getting awkward. "Not that much to be honest, do you know him well?". Of course he already knows the answer, Louis even told him the night before, so Harry rolls his eyes in his mind. Attempt number one to make up the conversation from the night before: failed.

"Well yeah, I think I can consider this house more like ' _home_ ' than my real one".

"Why?".

"Sometimes I need to be alone and think, and here I can do it because all of Zayn's sisters are attending university right now. Mine are always at home and sometimes I need silence".

"How many sisters do you have?". Okay, conversation.

"Four, but my mum is waiting for two twins".

"Holy shit, are you serious?".

Louis laughs, it's the first time Harry hears his laugh so closely. Both because Louis doesn't laugh that often, but also because they never spoke to each other apart from that one time outside the soccer field. Harry watches him laugh with Liam and Zayn at lunch, or when he leans against his locker, which Harry thanks is in the same hallway as his own, so he can give him little glances whenever he wants. He never heard the sound of his laugh though.

"So you see why I need the calm of Zayn's house?", Harry nods, his house is actually quiet, maybe someday Louis will go over to his house to escape the chaos of his home. He finishes to fantasize about that and puts the pancakes on the plates.

When Zayn walks into the kitchen he leaves a quick kiss on Louis' cheek, who smiles slightly and hands him a plate full of pancakes. Liam, Zayn and Louis, from what Harry has observed, always show their affection for each other, but then again, Harry always does that with Niall, who has just appeared in the kitchen with Liam.

Harry sits down next to Niall once he has finished handing each of them a plate, Louis is in front of him, but he doesn't seem to be interested in Harry anyway.

"I'm pretty sure we are in ' _The hangover_ '. Am I right?", Niall is the first to speak as soon as everyone sit down, he has his mouth full of pancakes and when he spoke a strange sound came out of his mouth and made everyone laugh.

"Yeah totally, I don't know who was the worst last night between you, Harry and Payno".

"Harry", Louis looks at Harry before smirking and going back to drinking his tea.

"In my opinion Liam was worse, or Niall. Fuck, Niall wanted to do a somersault at one point, I had to hold him to stop him".

They laugh, the conversation continues for a while, but Harry keeps his gaze on his plate, feeling his cheeks hot. Louis will _always_ remember that their first conversation took place while Harry was drunk, won't he?

Oh well, 'always', let's not exaggerate now. Harry is probably not important enough to be remembered for so long.

•••••

"Are you sure it was B?".

"Yeah, sure".

Zayn and Harry also nod, but Niall shakes his head instead. "God. My life is so difficult", Harry bursts out laughing when Niall drops dead in his arms. "It should be illegal to put a test on Monday morning".

Harry wraps his arm around his best friend's shoulders while all four of them walk toward the school canteen, maths is the only class that Harry, Niall, Zayn and Liam all have together. after the party on Friday, something have probably changed, because they had always left the classroom without even looking at each other and now they are all together.

Not that Harry expects to stay with them for lunch as well. When they finally arrive in the canteen, Harry looks around for a table. There is two different types of people in their school, the ones who always sit at the same table everyday, like Louis, Zayn and Liam; and the ones that simply sit at the first free table they find, like Harry and Niall.

"Hey" Louis appears a moment later behind them, Zayn wraps an arm around his shoulders and kisses his cheek, Louis rubs his nose behind Zayn's ear, "Niall, Harry, do you wanna sit with us?".

Harry is grateful that Niall said yes for both of them, he just follows the others towards their table, as if he doesn't already know that it's at the end of the room right under the window. As soon as they sit down, their table almost vibrates, following the movement of Harry's phone -the tables in the school canteen are old- and a message from Gemma appears on his screen. It isn't a long text, so Harry can read it without even opening his phone and it says: _“mum wrote me that she won't be coming home this weekend, I'm sorry H”_.

Harry sighs, biting his lower lip with his teeth as he replies with a simple “ok”. He hasn't seen his mother in weeks, and he misses her. Anne works for a famous English newspaper, and she travels a lot around England. Harry admires her so much, since his dad left a family consisting of a six years old boy, a seven years old girl and a woman without a job, Harry has completely lost the respect he felt for the one he unfortunately has to call dad.

When Harry woke up that morning and found himself without a dad, he thought it was a nightmare and he tried to wake himself up by pinching himself. When he was little he was sure that the love between his mum and dad would last forever, and his little heart broke when he realised that this wouldn't be the case.

"Is everything okay?", Niall runs a hand up and down his back, and Harry gives him a little smile that says 'yeah don't worry about it'. They both return to eat their sandwiches a moment later, their table is silent while everyone eat.

Niall is the first to finish his lunch, like always, that boy could eat four more sandwiches if he could, and he has already eaten two. Harry isn't even chewing at the moment, he is looking out of the window, it is very sunny outside. And he is thinking about the last time he went to the aquarium with Anne and Gemma before his mum left a few weeks earlier.

When he returns his attention to his lunch, he sees that Niall is no longer sitting next to him, he's now between Zayn and Liam and is showing them something on his phone. Louis who is in front of him turns to the window Harry has been looking at and raises an eyebrow.

"Oh, no. There's nothing outside actually, I was just thinking".

Louis nods. "What are you thinking, Harry?".

Zayn, Liam and Niall seem concentrate in what they are looking at in the blonde's phone, Louis and Harry are so far away from them that they almost seem to be sitting at a different table. "Nothing, I'm just a bit sad because I haven't seen my mum in two weeks".

Louis is resting his chin on the table, he continues to watch Harry in silence for a while, Harry has never seen a pair of eyes as beautiful as Louis', and he's sure that they will remain his favourite for the rest of his life, so he continues to admire them for a while longer. The light coming from the window is surrounding them, and Harry likes the way the sun lands perfectly on Louis' face, illuminating his eyes even more.

"The good part is that you didn't have to justify yourself on Saturday morning for the hangover, right?" Louis smiles slightly, you can tell by his tone that he doesn't actually know what to say. Harry smiles too, nodding.

"I really like this ring". Louis smiles a little before grabbing Harry's hand and looking closely at the ring. It’s a simple ring with ' _peace_ ' written on it, Gemma gave it to him a few months earlier as a birthday present, Harry likes it a lot too.

Louis continues to look at Harry's hands, gently running his fingers over all his rings. Louis' fingers are caressing his, as if he's afraid of breaking what he's touching, and Harry simply leaves him in control of his hand, he likes to watch Louis' eyes run over his fingers. They both don't say anything until Louis let go of Harry's hands.

"Hi, Louis".

Both their attention go to the girl standing behind Louis. "Hey, Eleanor", the girl ruffles his hair before leaving. After that, Niall is sitting next to Harry again, but the curly is too focused on watching the small smile Louis is trying to hide.

Harry spends the rest of lunch fairly quietly, both because he doesn't know how to join the conversation about football that the others are having, but also because his mum is still in his thoughts. And, if we want to be honest, he keeps seeing in his mind the smile Louis gave Eleanor earlier.

Once lunch is over, the last few hours of school go by pretty quickly, and Harry is happy when he and Niall are reunited with Zayn and Liam once again before heading out.

"Look at Liam guys, he's so cute when he's in love".

"Shut up Zayn", Liam rolls his eyes before playfully pushing Zayn, who is cupping his cheeks like a grandma does to her grandchild. Harry and Niall are laughing while looking at them, and Zayn wraps his arm around their shoulders a moment later. He tells them that Liam has spent the last ten minutes telling him how he met that girl called Maya and how they gave each others their phone numbers.

Harry is watching Liam's cheeks start to turn a bright red shade when he feels a hand messing with his hair. The others greet Louis, he stops between Zayn and Liam, in front of Harry, who only realises he hasn't said hello to him when Louis finally lies his gaze on him, before turning back to Zayn again.

Harry stops listening to the conversation and brings his attention to Louis' moving lips, and then to his blue eyes, and then to his not too big nose, then to his entire face. He continues to admire him for a few more seconds before looking away, as he feels his cheeks turn red.

"On Wednesdays we usually go to my place," when Harry looks up, Zayn is talking to him and Niall, "do you want to join us?". The three boys in front of them wait for an answer. Harry writes a message to Gemma saying that he would be at a friend's house and follows the others towards Louis' car.

"Harry, Niall, it's your first time on the Tomlinson vehicle, you decide who wants to go in front", Zayn opens the front door for them. Niall knows that sitting in the front means being close to Louis, so he lets Harry sit there, who feels himself blushing sightly again. Harry smiles at Niall to thank him before getting into the car, Louis turns to him for a second and then the car starts up.

Harry starts changing radio stations to find something good, he always does that in Gemma's car, by the time he realises what he's doing, he has already found a radio station playing The Neighbourhood, so he lets the song play and puts his hands in his pockets again.

He observes Louis, and he notices that he's singing, a little smile forms on his lips, because it's one of his favourite songs and Louis seems to know it. He also notices how Louis seems so calm while driving really fast. But most importantly, he notices that Louis keeps his free hand on the manual gearbox all the time. Exaggerate. Harry sometimes thinks too much and exaggerate, right? So, that somehow makes him think that maybe Louis is used to keeping his hand free for someone, maybe holding someone else's hand on his. Harry kinda feels a sense of jealousy for that someone, it’s stupid, but how lucky someone can be to be touched by Louis even while he's driving? As if he always wants to be in contact with that someone.

Before he can notice anything else, they arrive at Zayn's house, it's already the second time in a week Harry finds himself there, the thought makes him smile for some unknown reason. They bump into Zayn's mum in the doorway, who pecks Zayn's cheek and smiles at him, Zayn doesn't do anything. It's awkward, so Harry and Niall decide to introduce themselves since they are the only ones still stranger to her.

They finally get inside, Harry and Niall follow the movements of the others, they leave their backpack and their shoes in the hallway before moving into the living room, Harry sits down in the couch next to Niall and Louis, Zayn pulls out two joysticks. "Payno, wanna play?", he turns to Liam after turning on a game Harry seems to be the only one who doesn't know.

Liam nods, taking the joystick. "Niall?", the blonde also nods, and Louis rolls his eyes. "Ok Harry, let's leave these losers alone with their stupid game". Liam flips Louis off, Zayn presses ' _Start_ ' a moment later, and Harry laughs.

Louis stands up from the couch and walks towards the kitchen, Harry only realises he's smiling when Louis looks at him and motions for him to follow him in the kitchen. Harry stands up after waiting for his cheeks to return to a normal color, he sees Louis waiting for him as he enters the kitchen. A moment later Louis get out the door which isn't connected to the living room, "It was just a technique to make Zayn believe we were going to the kitchen".

He starts to climb the stairs so fast that Harry has to take two steps at a time to reach him, and once they are upstairs, Louis enters Zayn's room. Harry closes the door behind them, Louis is looking inside Zayn's closet when he goes to sit at the end of the bed. "What are you doing?".

"Stealing Zayn's clothes". The room is filled with silence for almost a minute before Louis looks at Harry, who is looking at him questionably. "I look at Zayn's clothes and I choose the one I like the most, Zayn comes to school two weeks later and ask me and Payno ' _Did I borrow you my shirt? I can't find it_ ' and then I tell him that he borrowed it to me but that he doesn't remember. To finish, I look at him with my puppy eyes and my baby face and it's done, I ask him if I can keep it and he says yes because no one can say no to me".

When Louis finishes the story, Harry's dying of laughter, the boy gives him a small smile before turning back to the wardrobe. Harry tries to replay in his mind that little smile Louis has just dedicated to him. He wants to see another one, Louis doesn't smile often, but when he does, his face lights up, and it seems to light up everything around him.

"Can I see these puppy eyes that no one can say no to?".

Louis, like Harry had hoped, smiles again. He walks on his knees to the bed and then rests his chin on Harry's legs, he can see Louis' eyelashes from above, he isn't doing anything in particular, just relaxing his face and blinking faster than usual, but Harry has to agree with him. Could he say no to these eyes? Of course not.

"Did I convince you?".

Harry nods, he feels the saliva he has held in his mouth until then finally flows down his throat, Louis smiles again before getting up and returning to look inside the closet. Zayn's clothes all seem to be too big to fit Louis, but the boy is still throwing them on the bed, next to Harry, who's running his fingers over the fabric of a t-shirt when another one hits him in the face. Louis is smirking when Harry looks at him and sees him closing the wardrobe.

Louis raises his arms and pulls the sweater he's wearing off his head, looking through the t-shirts on the bed one to try first. Harry tells himself not to look at him, but finds himself doing it anyway, he turns his attention to Louis' body, the light lines of his abdominals gives him a divine air. It seems like God has sculpted his hips, which fall softly into the skinny jeans he's wearing.

Louis has his lower lip between his teeth, with his eyes he looks at each piece of clothing before choosing a black t-shirt. "Which university do you want to go to next year?", when Harry asks that, he does so to think of something other than Louis' body, but he also does so to know how far away from him the boy with blue eyes will go.

"Manchester". Harry finds out that the option Louis most prefers is a university an hour and a half away from their town, there's a very strong football team there and Louis has wanted to be part of it since he was a child. He hasn't been admitted yet, but Harry knows how good he is at football, he will definitely be admitted. Or so Harry hopes, he'd like to tell him that he's seen him play plenty of times and that he's one of the best players in the school, but he doesn't, so Louis ends the conversation.

When Louis finishes changing, he chooses a black vans t-shirt and puts the remaining ones back in the closet, his lower lip still between his teeth. And God, Harry's dying to kiss him, he thinks about the feeling of Louis' lips on his. God.

Louis doesn't notice the moment of adoration the younger boy has just given him, but Harry still feels a shiver in his arms from embarrassment. "Do you wanna go back to the others?".

Harry doesn't want to. He wants to be with Louis a little longer, just the two of them, something that a week before seemed only a dream, but he nods and follows Louis down the stairs.

•••••

"A Big Mac menù and 6 chicken McNuggets, for you Harry? ...Mh, alright, and a chocolate milkshake, please". Once Gemma has taken their orders, Harry takes a sip of his milkshake. They sing together ' _The less I know the better_ ' until they get home and both sit down at kitchen table, Gemma continues to eat in silence and Harry does the same with his milkshake, when he finishes it, he turns to watch his sister.

"There should be, uhm, a guy coming over in 10 minutes. Do you mind?".

"No, of course not. Do I know him?".

"Nop". Harry keeps looking at her and Gemma stops chewing when she feels his gaze on her, "Is there something going on between you two, Gemma?".

"It's just the second time we have seen each other, Harry".

"So you are seeing each other". Gemma rolls her eyes and goes back to eat her Bic Mac, but Harry keeps watching her chew, he's somehow creepy. "What about you, Harry?".

"What?".

"Are you seeing someone?".

"Mh, no".

Gemma goes back to eating once more, Harry steals some of her fries, the chocolate and salty aftertaste makes his nose wrinkle. "There's a boy I really like, thought".

He waits for a reaction from her before going on, but they just find themselves looking at each other in silence. Gemma continues eating, waiting for her brother to continue, and she covers her mouth with her hand after a few minutes, "Is it... Niall?".

"What the fuck, no, not Niall", Harry laughs.

"How am I supposed to know, tell me who it is".

"Louis".

Gemma stops chewing and Harry sees that she's about to say something, but her mouth closes a moment later, "Louis Tomlinson?".

"Yeah".

"Oh" Gemma puts her Bic Mac aside this time, Harry steals another one of her fries, his hand is shaking a little, "I-I have never noticed it before, I'm so sorry Harry".

"Why? It's not your fault, I've never said anything about him".

Gemma smiles a little "Does he like you back?".

"We like, spoke three times? Of course not, he doesn't even know me".

"Well, let him get to know you, then" she smirks, and Harry throws a chip at her, "Stop it".

She smiles again before shaking her head, and then she laughs.

"What?".

"Nothing, I was thinking about you and Louis together".

"Yeah I know it's funny, thank you very much".

"It's not funny, you would look very good together. You would be the hottest couple of our school".

"Stop it, seriously" Harry rolls his eyes, "And please, don't tell anyone".

"Promise. What is your plan now?".

"What do you mean 'plan'?".

"How are going to seduce him and become the hottest couple of our school?".

"Just so you know, I'm going to my room now and you will stay there, alone". Gemma flips him off when he stands up. Harry leaves the kitchen and stands outside the door for a moment before poking his head into the room again, "So you think I'm hot?".

"Get the fuck out of here Harry".


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi everyone:) I like this chapter, you’ll see more about Harry and Louis’ passions, so yeah :3 I hope you’ll like it too.  
> \+ school is killing me so I’m sorry if it takes me long to update, I’m trying my best. thank you for the kudos and the bookmarks <3

_Pay attention, I hope that you listen_   
_’cause I let my guard down_   
_Right now I’m completely defenceless_

Harry sighs as he enters the library and sees it half empty, English is one of the few subjects he doesn't have with any of his friends, and his teacher is absent so he has to spend the hour in the library. He doesn't have anything to study though, and he doesn't know any of the people sitting there. It's going to be a long and boring hour.

He finishes his maths exercises in less than 10 minutes -he's good at maths- and now there he is, looking out of the window while his hands are quickly going up and down on his thighs, the fabric of his jeans seems to be on fire from the speed with which Harry is moving his hands.

"Hi Harry", the curly almost jumps as he feels a hand on his shoulder. When he looks up he meets Louis' eyes above him, his face is relaxed, and he removes his hand from Harry' shoulder as soon as the boy under him returns his gaze. A moment later Louis sits down next to him, he has some books under his arm, which he places on the table, his hair ends up in front of his forehead, but he only takes it off when he finishes taking out some pens.

"Do you often look out of the windows?", Harry blinks quickly and shakes his head, Louis nods, smirking slightly. Some of his friends are sitting at a table further away, but Louis seems to have prepared everything to stay with Harry, he's now pulling a notebook out of his backpack.

"Don't you go with your friends?".

"Am I disturbing you here?", Harry shakes his head once more, and Louis nods again before opening his history book. He flips through the pages quickly before stopping, the words are all highlighted in different colors, and there are small stylized drawings on the sides of the pages. Louis probably notices Harry's attention on his book, because a moment later he says "Different colors help me study better".

Harry decides to continue his essay about racism that he's supposed to do for the next day while Louis is concentrated on his history book. The curly tries to look at him every now and then, Louis is chewing on the pen cap while highlighting with 5 different colors, and Harry notices that when he has to concentrate he always makes the same expression, he stops writing and stares at the wall in front of him with narrowed eyes.

Louis closes his book almost half an hour later, Harry hasn't written much during those 30 minutes, but he closes his notebook too when Louis puts his things in his backpack. "Why did you come here with me?".

"Because I knew that if I stayed with my friends they wouldn't let me study", Harry nods, not sure if he has to interpretate Louis' words in a good way or in a bad way like _'I came here just because I had to study, not because I want to be with you'_.

"Do you always stare at people when you study with them?".

Louis stands up, and Harry is terrified for a moment until he feels the swivel chair he's sitting on turn 180 degrees. Louis has sit down at the table behind theirs, Harry looks up to see his eyes. "Uhm, I'm sorry, when I don't know what to write I stare at things in front of me", it's not true, of course, he was looking at Louis, but that's the first thing that comes into his mind.

"So now it's my fault?", Louis smirks, he runs his tongue over his lips before speaking again, "I was just kidding Harry, you've only looked at me twice. Not that I mind. It's funny to see your reactions every time though". Harry covers his face with his hands, they are frozen and the warmth of his cheeks when he places them on his skin seems to have doubled. Louis is still smirking when Harry looks at him, and when he runs his tongue over his lower lip again the curly looks away so as not to blush more.

"What were you writing?".

"Nothing, just an essay for school".

"I thought one of your porno stories".

"Oh no, I don't write those in public". Louis seems to like his answer, he raises his hands and his lips curves slightly.

"Will I ever be able to read some of the things you write? I mean, the other things you write".

Harry wonders if one day Louis will ever read the song he is writing for him. The answer is no, probably not, and here a person wonders 'why write something for someone if that someone will never read it?'. The answer isn't that difficult for Harry, because it isn't the first time he has written something for Louis.

Harry shakes his head, and Louis looks at him for a moment before looking around, his friends are being so loud at a table not too far from them, Harry was wondering earlier how Louis had managed to study while their noises filled the room. "Well, it's not really a passion, but sometimes I like to take pictures of things. I don't know if I'm good at it, I just do it, I've never shown anything to anyone though", Louis extends his hand towards Harry. The curly looks at him confused, not knowing exactly what the boy in front of him is actually asking him.

"Why are you so interested in reading what I write?", Louis pulls his hand away, "Never mind, forget about it".

"No, it's okay, I'll let you read something. It's just, I'm a little ashamed, sorry, I'm not even that good probably, so don't get your hopes up, okay?". Louis nods as Harry bends down to pick a notebook from his backpack.

He doesn't write everything there, he has another notebook at home where he writes more. Harry doesn't really know what he writes, a poet from Dolce Stil Novo would call them poetries, but Harry likes to call them ' _paragraphs without a beginning and without an end_ '.

He hands his notebook to Louis, who in return hands him his phone, which is opened in the photo gallery. "It's because I want to know you".

"What?".

"You asked me why I'm so interested in reading your things. It's because I want to know you". Louis starts reading a moment later, the curly admires as he turns the pages so gently and runs his eyes over the words written by Harry.

Harry turns his attention to the phone in his hand and looks at the pictures taken by Louis, in most of them there are always the same two girls, so it comes naturally to him to ask "Your sisters?".

Louis nods, "Yeah don't worry, I'm not doing child pornography". Harry smiles slightly before returning to scroll, he stops on one particular photo, Louis is also in the photo, so he probably didn't take it, but Harry sees it anyway.

Louis is laying on the floor with the same two girls in his arms. He's laughing, so much that he has his head bent back and his back arched against the floor. Harry has never seen him laugh like that, he seems an angel. He could swear that there is a divine light around him, because his sisters are also laughing, but Louis seems to be the most important part of the photo.

"I really like this one", Harry quickly changes picture when he looks up at Louis and sees him handing him the notebook, Harry does the same and hands the phone back to him.

"The one that says: ‘All the lights couldn't put out the dark, running through my heart. Lights up and they know who you are.’ This one is my favourite, but the others are also very beautiful".

Harry smiles again, "Thank you, Louis. I really like the photo of your sisters playing football". He obviously likes it, it's his favourite after the one of Louis laughing.

"Hey Harry, speaking of football, I have a match this Friday, wanna come? You can bring Niall too, if you two want".

"Yes, I mean, yeah. I don't have anything else to do and, yeah, Niall's coming too. Yeah".

"Ok Harry" Louis laughs and gets up when the bell rings.

"See you at lunch?", Louis nods before leaving the classroom, and Harry.

•••••

"It will be strange not to see this room when you move into the new house".

"Shut up Harry, this room is horrible", Harry laughs, he's laying on Niall's bed and staring at the ceiling. Niall is sitting at the end of the bed looking at something on his phone, Harry taps him with his foot when he looks up and sees him.

"Niall, if you aren't ready in two minutes I'll go alone", Niall rolls his eyes and finally stands up, Harry follows him with his eyes as he slips on his shirt and fixes his hair, it seems that the more Harry tells him to hurry up, the slower he is. The curly looks at the time on his phone, it's 8:05 pm, the match has probably already started and Niall seems to be doing everything he can to make them late.

After ten minutes they finally manage to sit down next to their friends, Harry sits next to Zayn. Niall gives him one last angry look before turning to talk to Liam, but the curly stops to worry about it when his eyes lies on the reason why they are there tonight. Louis is on the field and he is running after the ball, his hair pulled back in a black bandana. Harry looks at him, he's lightly sweaty on his forehead, you can tell by the white lights of the field that are illuminating his skin. Harry thinks he is beautiful. And when he hears Zayn talking, he realises that he has been staring at Louis for too long.

"Mh?".

Zayn looks at him like he's an alien before smiling, Harry can feel his cheeks heat up with embarrassment. "I just asked you if you wanted to come to Nando's with us after the game, Niall's coming".

_Of course Niall is coming._

"Yeah, yeah, I'm coming too", Zayn squeezes his shoulder before they both go back to concentring, Zayn on the match, Harry on Louis, who's looking towards them when Harry looks at him again. Liam waves at him and Louis smiles quickly before going back to following the ball, Harry tries to take a mental photograph of that smile.

He spends the rest of the time alternating between talking to Zayn and watching Louis, who has scored a goal during the game.

Louis arrives in front of his car where the others are waiting for him ten minutes after the end of the game, their four faces light up when they see him running towards them. He rushes to hug Zayn, who spins him around twice before Louis moves on to hug Liam and Niall quickly.

Before Harry can realize what he's doing, Louis wraps his arms around his neck. Harry feels his warm breath against the skin and held his little body in his arms for probably only a second before Louis breaks away and goes back to talking with Liam about the goal he has scored. Harry continues to feel the sensation of Louis' body on his for a few more seconds, it was a quick hug, the kind of hug you give to everyone, but Harry has felt butterflies in his stomach anyway.

He admires Louis talking to Liam and Niall, he is bursting with joy, if it was night he would probably light up the whole car park. Harry can't help but look at him like he is the most beautiful thing in the world. He is. He's beautiful.

 _That’s what beauty looks like_ , Harry thinks.

Louis’ eyes shine so brightly that Harry feels almost outside his own body, wanting to relive the moment when he held Louis in his arms again, over and over again, another thousand times.

"Are you coming?", Zayn's hand on his shoulder brings him back to reality.

“Mh? Oh, yeah”.

It's still early to go to Nando's when they get into Louis' car after the game is over. Zayn proposes to go to his house until dinnertime, and they all agree immediately. Liam is sitting beside Louis, and Harry is behind him, laughing against the window, crushed against it by Zayn and Niall, who are singing a Rihanna song that's playing on the radio. Louis is shaking his head from the driver's seat, occasionally turning to Niall and Zayn and trying to hit one of them without getting distracted from the road, but Harry can see Louis' reflection on the rearview window, and he's trying not to laugh as he watches the two sing.

"Nando's does take-away?".

"Yes", Niall is informed on the subject. Every time they enter the restaurant -after he finally manages to convince Harry to go to Nando’s with him-, the man at the checkout, who is always the same, greets Niall like they're best friends.

"How about we stay at my place and eat there? We can order and Louis can go get our food". They answer yes immediately once again, and then Liam asks "Is it just us or are your parents home too?".

Zayn laughs slightly, Harry can see Louis clearing his throat and turning to Liam, who looks at him confused, maybe he doesn't understand what he said wrong, and to be honest, Niall and Harry don't understand it either. "Just us. Like always. It was already an honour that my mum graced us with her presence last week when you greeted her at my house".

The car is filled with silence after that, even when they arrive at Zayn's house and leave their shoes in the doorway before moving into the living room, silence continues to reign between them. Niall is the first who talks after a while, "Do you want me to call and order?".

After Niall has finished to take their order, which is still an hour away, the awkward silence from earlier is finally gone. Liam and Niall are playing a game on Zayn's PlayStation in the living room, while Harry, Zayn and Louis are laying the table in the kitchen. It doesn't take them long to prepare everything, and once they are done they stay in the kitchen.

"Zayn", Harry turns off his phone and turns to Louis, even though he isn't the one being called, Zayn turns to Louis too. “Yes?”.

"You know that Liam didn't mean to be rude earlier with that question".

Zayn sighs, he has his arms crossed and he's leaning against the side of the cooker. Louis is standing in front of him, and Harry is simply sitting next to them, he's thinking of leaving them alone, that's none of his business and they deserve privacy. "I know, Louis. I said nothing against him".

Harry stands up after this, but Zayn speaks before he can leave the room, "No Harry, you can stay".

"It's none of my business, so I thought-", Harry is standing in the doorway, Zayn's attention on him, Louis is looking down at the floor. "The conversation is over, anyway", Zayn walks out the door a moment later, Louis finally looks up and meets Harry's eyes. "Sorry, it's my fault. I shouldn't have brought it up again".

Harry shakes his head and moves away from the door, entering the kitchen again. Louis is in front of him now, sitting on the kitchen counter, which is why he is taller than Harry. "I don't know why Zayn doesn't want to talk about his parents, but it's not your fault".

"It's not that he doesn't want to talk about them, it's just that they're too busy traveling around the world instead of staying with their son. Zayn is here, alone every day because his sisters are away for university, but his parents don't care about that". Louis still has his eyes on the floor, as if he has said things he has no right to say.

The room is filled with silence again, Harry wants to say something, but nothing comes to his mind, and Louis seems to have said too much already, so they both stay silent with their eyes on the floor.

"Wanna go back to the others?".

The awkwardness disappears when they join the others in the living room, Harry is grateful that Niall is there too, because in a few seconds he can brighten up the atmosphere, like he always does. When dinner times arrives, Louis and Liam go to take their orders and only Niall, Harry and Zayn are left at home; everything seems to be back to normal, and once their have finished eating they all decide to watch a movie together.

" _Fast & Furious_?".

"Oh God, please no".

"What do you want to watch then?".

"I don't know, maybe _Harry Potter_?".

"I know every word of it".

"Let's watch ‘ _The order of the Phoenix_ ’, it's the best one".

"No, we start from the first one".

"Do we really wanna watch _Harry Potter_?".

"Propose something else then".

"I don't know".

So. The idea of watching a movie falls quite quickly, Niall and Zayn keep arguing a bit more on the subject, but they give up shortly afterwards.

"Is it too late to go to the basketball court?", everyone's attention moves to Liam when he finishes talking, they think about it for a moment, it's 10 pm, but it's Friday, so they don't really care about the time and a minute later they're back in Louis' car. It's cold outside, really cold, and Harry is beginning to regret having said yes.

None of them can actually play basketball, -Louis justified himself by saying 'I play football, not basketball'- but at least they know how to use their imagination, so they decide to play a game in which whoever makes the most baskets, wins. Yes. That's their imagination.

They have split into two teams, and Harry is happy to be with Niall, and Louis, who is the salvation of their team. Harry has only scored twice and the blonde after more than 10 rounds has still not scored once.

"We're all cheering for you Ni", Harry puts his hands around his mouth when he shouts, -it's his attempt to simulate a fan at the stadium-. Louis is on his knees reciting some kind of prayer under voice while Zayn and Liam are making up a choreography on the spot, shouting like cheerleaders.

Maybe God is listening to them, because Niall scores.

"Guys!" when he turns to his friends, they're all running towards him, and a moment later the four of them are practically smothering Niall in a big hug. The blonde is laughing too hard to ask them to take off, and when they do, Liam picks him up and starts running around the field while Niall continues to laugh.

"I'm so proud of him," Louis pretends to wipe away tears, a moment later he wraps his arms around Harry's body and his face disappears against the curly's neck, "our baby has grown so much". Harry's skin vibrates when Louis keeps pretending to cry against his neck, Zayn is laughing so hard next to them that he may even have tears in his eyes. Harry is laughing too, Louis' hair is in his face, and he feels like running his fingers through it as he looks down at them.

He is smiling as he watches Louis pretend to cry against his neck, maybe even his cheeks are red, and he is smiling. He's smiling like a child on Christmas day. But when he looks up at Zayn and meets his gaze, he stops smiling and looks at Niall and Liam in the middle of the field.

He still feels Zayn's gaze on him, though.

•••••

Maybe Harry is the kind of person who gets very attached to things. Because, even though he has known those guys for how long? A few weeks? The memory of that Friday night makes him smile.

He woke up very early that morning, and every time he tried to go back to sleep, his body seemed to refuse to do so. So he ended up with his notebook in his hand, not the same notebook he had given Louis in the library -fortunately, since there are also sentences dedicated to him in this one- and he was amazed at how quickly he could write about his friends. The words seemed to come out of his pen as if they had always been there and were just waiting to be let out.

Maybe writing a little was the solution, because, he didn't even realise when, but he went back to sleep. He only really realises it when he is woken up by Gemma and Niall, who jump on top of him. "Good morning beautiful Harry". Niall starts kissing his face, Gemma is laughing in the background, and Harry is trying to get his best friend off him.

"Hey Harry, are you sure you told me the truth when I asked you if there was anything between you?", Harry raises his middle finger to Gemma, who is still laughing slightly, and Niall slips under the covers with him, attaching himself to Harry with both arms and legs. "Why did you lie to her, Haz? I think it's time to make our relationship official".

"Niall, if you don't get off me within 5 seconds, I'm going to dump a bucket of cold water on your head as soon as I get up".

"You didn't seem to mind being hugged by Louis the other night, though." Niall smirks a little, but his smile falls away a moment later and silence fills the room. "Shit," Niall looks at Gemma for a second and then back at Harry, "Fuck, I'm so sorry Harry”.

"I told Gemma last week".

"Seriously?", Harry nods, still feeling a little uncomfortable that this conversation is happening while they're all on top of each other on his bed, and his breath is probably still bad at this time of the morning. What time is it? He grabs his phone from the bedside table and sees that it's 10 o'clock, more than four hours have passed since he first woke up.

"Well?" Niall and Harry bring their attention to Gemma, "You don't tell me anything about the hug Louis gave you?".

Niall giggles, "Harry looked like a tree while Louis hugged him". Harry covers his face with his hands, "He was literally like this", Niall stands up and stands beside the bed with his hands along his sides and his eyes wide open. Gemma starts laughing again, and Niall manages to keep a straight face for only a few more seconds before joining her laughter.

"For your information Niall, Louis and I were making fun of you while he was hugging me. And he wasn't even hugging me, it was all part of the scene".

Harry rolls his eyes as he sees that the two don't stop laughing after his words, so he decides to get up and go to the bathroom. "Fuck off", as he walks out, he raises his middle finger in their direction.

"Harry hurry up and get dressed, we're going to Crives for breakfast".

"I'm not going to have breakfast with you two," he shouts in response before entering the bathroom, but when he gets in front of his reflection in the mirror he bursts out laughing too, shaking his head slightly.

He is starving, he feels his belly rumbling as soon as he steps into the shower, hot water starts pouring down his brown curls a moment later, and Harry would like to stay in there for at least another two hours, but he decides to listen to Gemma's words and tries to take as little time as possible.

Harry enters his room again 20 minutes later, he has finished fixing his hair with gel pretty quickly, and has slipped on the first pair of black jeans he found in the wardrobe and a Nirvana sweatshirt.

"Are we going or what?", Gemma and Niall nod, Harry giving them both a mad look, before laughing and wrapping his arms around their shoulders.


	4. Chapter 4

_I'll show you my heart, for when you're lonely and forget who you are._   
_I'm missing half of me when we're apart_

Harry takes the AirPods out of his ears as he arrives in front of the school entrance. Gemma is sick today, so he walked to school, now his hands are frozen.

"Hey Harry".

He stops rubbing his hands together when a smiling Zayn appears next to him, his hair up in a quiff. "Hi Zayn", they don't have their first lesson together, but the five of them always wait for each others in front of the school entrance before entering once the first bell rings, so they walk together. They see Niall and Liam, Louis is not there yet, and Harry starts looking around for him in the crowd. Instead, he finds Zayn staring at him when he turns around, "Harry, can we talk?".

The curly nods, Zayn is serious right now, he has stopped walking, Harry does the same by standing next to him. A person would say that they are probably dealing drugs, or who knows what, because they are quite hidden from people's eyes.

"Do you like Louis?".

Harry's eyes move to Zayn's face, who is still serious, and Harry doesn't know how to interpret that expression.

Is that obvious?

He continues to return the gaze of the boy next to him in silence, hoping for a normal expression on his face. He doubts it. Zayn seems to notice his embarrassment, because he puts a hand on his shoulder, "Sorry, I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable".

"I'm not uncomfortable, I just didn't expect this question".

"I just," Zayn's face relaxes a little, "noticed how you look at him".

"How do I look at him?".

Zayn doesn't say anything, just looks at Harry, but somehow seems to be saying a lot of things anyway. So Harry nods.

It's that obvious.

The thought of other people noticing it too besides Zayn, maybe Liam, maybe Louis, terrifies Harry for a moment. "Zayn, please don't tell anyone".

Zayn messes up Harry's curls a little before turning towards the entrance, "I won't."

"Is that obvious?".

Zayn shakes his head, which makes Harry calm down slightly, "I guess I'm just good at reading people's emotions, but Louis sure didn't notice. And neither did Liam, I don't think anyone did".

They both look towards the entrance again, Harry thinks Zayn wants to go to the others, but before they can do so he takes enough courage to ask him "Do you think I might have a chance with him at some point?".

Zayn sighs. It's over, Harry thinks. He runs a hand through his hair, afraid of the answer. He already knows it. But hearing it come out of Zayn's lips is probably worse.

"It's complicated".

Harry is somehow hoping that Zayn will continue, but he doesn't, he just stares at him. He speaks again an endless time later, "I don't even know if he likes boys really, the only relationship he's had was with a girl".

"Eleanor, I know. How did it end between them?".

Zayn pulls out his phone and looks at the time, Harry sees on his screen that there are still 10 minutes left before the bell rings. "Louis fell for Eleanor when we met her last year, you know, he started flirting with her and she didn't seem to mind. There was also another guy, I think Max or something like that, who was also into her, and that's why Eleanor kept them both in suspense by not making a choice between them. After literally months she chose Louis, it wasn't fair to make him wait so long, but he was too in love to understand it".

Harry nods, but Zayn instead shakes his head, "You asked me how it ended, not how it started". Harry nods again, wondering if he still wants to hear the love story between Louis and Eleanor.

"Louis said he was the happiest person in the world, they were always together, God, he was always talking about her and" Zayn stops when he sees Harry looking down at his feet, he's going up and down on his toes, and Zayn stops him by putting a hand on his shoulder, "Sorry. I mean, that relationship wasn't good for Louis, but he didn't see it. And I don't know how but, before school started, Liam and I made him understand it and yeah, that's it. He opened his eyes. Just like that. On the same day they broke up, and now she is trying to be friends with him again".

Harry isn't sure what to do or say when Zayn finishes speaking, but he realises a moment later that he hasn't finished. "He was in love with her, so in love. And one day," Zayn snaps his fingers, "he never felt sad about their breakup, never said anything about it to me and Liam and, he was still him. The same Louis as before. Like anything had happened".

Zayn is serious again, not that he ever stopped being serious, but now he seems more than before. "I can't say that what I'm about to tell you is true, but Harry, I've known him for ten years, Louis wasn't like this a year ago. But, how can a person feel, knowing that he was almost someone's second choice? Never enough. And I've seen him, I've seen him start to slowly lose self-esteem and always put himself in second place. So I can't tell you if you'll ever have a chance with him or not, because I don't know this, but I can tell you that it's not that simple".

 _Oh_.

Harry looks towards the entrance once more, where he saw Niall and Liam earlier, and this time he finds Louis with them. His light-brown hair is more messy than usual, and Harry would love to run his hand through his fringe and roll a tuft of hair around his fingers. He finds himself smiling as he looks at him, when Louis speaks his lips move slowly, they are thin, and he runs his tongue over them every now and then, Harry has noticed that he does it a lot.

When the curly turns around again, he sees Zayn smiling slightly at him, "I really hope Louis feels the same as you do, Harry".

"Do you think he's still in love with Eleanor?".

"I don't think so. But I think that before he can love someone else, he has to learn to love himself again".

Harry's eyes return to Louis again, he wants to hold him close in his arms, leave little kisses on his forehead and tell him how perfect he really is. How can he not see that? How can he not see the light that he radiates when he smiles? Or even when he simply does nothing. He is brilliant, always, and Harry sees this. How can Louis not see that?

The sound of the bell brings him back to reality and, without thinking, he wraps his arms around Zayn's shoulders, whispering a small 'thank you' at the level of his ear. Zayn musses his hair once more, before they head towards the school entrance together.

•••••

Two days have passed since that conversation, and this day Gemma has a date with a certain boy called Ashton after school, the same boy she had told Harry about a few weeks earlier, and that means she can't take him home after school. And although Harry doesn't mind walking, he still finds himself asking Louis for a lift.

When they get into the car, Harry sits in the front again, at Louis' request, as he is 'the only one with decent taste in music', a definition that made him when it came out of the older one's mouth.

They take a road that Harry doesn't recognize, probably to Liam's house, and in the meantime he turns over several radios -this time Louis has given him permission to do so-, he decides to stop at a station that is playing a song that he doesn't know the title of.

"Do you listen to _Wallows_?" Louis turns to Harry as they stop in front of a red house, Liam's house.

"Uhm, I honestly don't know them".

"This is one of their songs".

"I let it play because I liked it".

Louis smiles, and Harry does the same, "It's called _Scrawny_. You should try listening to them, they are a mix of Punk, Rock and Pop". Harry nods and pulls out his phone to look up the band on Spotify, but quickly turns around when Louis coughs slightly. He has leaned his arm against the seat, almost giving himself a push upwards, and remains looking at Harry as if he's inspecting his face. And maybe he is, the curly almost feels examined under his gaze.

"What's your favourite artist, Harry?".

" _Arctic Monkeys_ , obviously". He says it like it's obvious, it is obvious. "What about you?".

And Louis smiles, again, " _Arctic Monkeys_ , obviously. And _The Neighbourhood_ ".

"I love them".

"That explains why you played one of their songs last time." Louis is still smiling, he breaks their eye contact only to grab his phone and hand it to Harry. "I have two playlists on Spotify, one happy and one sad, if you like them, send them to you. And if you want to, send me yours too, sometimes music helps you get to know someone".

Harry feels himself almost blushing, he takes Louis' phone from his hands, their fingers touch for a second, Louis doesn't even notice, but that touch is enough to make Harry's heart do a flip.

He only remembers Zayn's presence when his head appears between him and Louis, "Are you done flirting? Can we go now?". Harry rolls his eyes, making a mental note to beat Zayn up later, he's feeling his cheeks heat up and even without looking at Louis he can tell he's as embarrassed as he is because he coughs slightly.

Harry decides to send himself both playlists, which he will listen to when he gets home. Louis doesn't have his number, and when Harry has to choose how to save his contact he pauses for a moment, something inside him telling him not to exaggerate and just call himself 'Harry', but he finds himself typing 'Hazza'. When he hands the phone back to Louis he hopes his cheeks are back to a normal colour, Zayn before getting out of the car gives them both a kiss on the cheek, then starts running towards the front door, causing them to laugh.

When Louis starts the car again, Harry remembers that he needs directions to his house. Louis will find out where he lives, not that Harry expects to find him at his house often, but the thought makes him smile anyway. Before he can talk, he's interrupted by the ring of Louis' phone, who says a little 'sorry' before answering the call.

"Hey Lottie...Yeah...Right now?...Alright, say hi to mum...Yeah...Yeah... I love you too, see ya later".

Harry waits for a few moments while Louis finishes writing a message, "Hey Harry, do you mind if we pick up my sisters from school first? They finish now and my mum can't go".

"No problem", and for Harry there really is no problem, he will spend extra time with Louis, and he loves spend time with him.

Less than ten minutes later they arrive in front of a school that Harry doesn't even know, the two completely identical girls of probably ten years old that Harry has already seen in the pictures taken by Louis get into the car as they stop in front of the entrance. "Hi girls" Louis turns with a smile that Harry finds adorable, they start laughing before focusing their attention on Harry.

"Oh, hi, I'm Harry," he smiles at both of them after they tell him their names are Phoebe and Daisy, and Louis starts the car again.

"Loooooouis" Harry doesn't recognise which one of them spoke, but he finds Louis' reaction adorable once his name is called, he sticks his tongue out at the rear view mirror and his sisters laugh. "Mum always takes us to the park after school".

"I know Daisy, but we have to get Harry home", Louis gives a quick look towards the curly and then towards his sisters who are pretending to cry, then he sighs. "Do you have anything else to do?", Harry thinks about the chemistry homework he has to do, and the history test he will have in two days, but the thought of spending more time with Louis attracts him more, so he shakes his head and a few minutes later they park outside a park. Daisy and Phoebe immediately get out of the car, and Harry and Louis find themselves following them almost running.

"Sorry, it's becoming impossible to bring you home".

Harry shakes his head smiling, he finds himself looking at Louis' lips for a second before returning to his blue eyes, and he hopes that the boy in front of him didn't notice the shiver he just had down his arms. Louis is shorter than him, you don't even notice it really, Harry only really realises it as they stand there watching Phoebe and Daisy run around the park, they are so close that their shoulders almost touch.

Harry sees one of the twins running towards him, he feels the sleeve of his shirt tugging, finding himself watching Daisy -or maybe Phoebe?- passing him and Louis a ball.

"You sucked at basketball, now show me if you can play soccer, curly".

"Oh fuck off Tomlinson".

They find themselves playing some kind of soccer all together for almost an hour, or maybe more.

Harry actually spends half of the time watching Louis laugh and chase after his sisters. They're all freezing to death, but they keep playing and running around like children until their hands get so cold that Harry stops feeling his own fingers.

When Louis gives Harry his hoodie before getting into the car, the curly tries to stop himself from smiling, but he finds himself doing it anyway until he gets home. And he keeps smiling even when he gets in, his cheeks almost hurting.

He wonders if it's normal that his heart is beating so fast.

•••••

It smells like Louis.

His hoodie, it smells of Louis. And Harry can't explain the scent in words, but if he had to, he would say it smells like a baked cake and vanilla bath foam.

That night he wore it to sleep, when he woke up he thought for a moment that Louis was there with him, which made him smile. He kept smiling even as he had breakfast with Gemma, and when he returned to his room and found a message from Louis, his heart started beating faster than usual once again.

** Louis: **   
_I like the choice of name for your contact, will you allow me to call you Hazza then?_

**Harry:**   
_if you want to :) Shall I bring you back your hoodie?_

**Louis:**   
_keep it, it looks better on you than on me anyway_   
_oh, and I really like your playlist :) Lana del Rey. God, I love her_

Harry finds himself smiling once again, he has never really stopped doing it, and he sadly sighs when he has to take off Louis' hoodie to get into some normal clothes for school. He finishes getting dressed at the exact moment that Gemma enters his room and asks him if he is ready.

Once in the car, Harry turns on the radio as usual. In fact there is never anything interesting at that time of the morning, they only talk about the weather and the main news of the day, but he does it every day. Gemma messes up his hair, which upsets him a little since he has spent ten minutes fixing it with hair gel; he has been fixing it like this for a few months now, since school started actually.

The ride is fairly quiet, Gemma parks in front of the school several minutes later and goes to meet her friends while Harry goes to his.

"Hi Harry," Niall laughs when all four of them say Harry's name at the same time, the curly wraps an arm around his shoulders as soon as Niall stops laughing. "Propose to Harry the idea for tonight".

"A friend of mine is throwing a party and he said I can invite whoever I want, it probably won't be that much but we were thinking of going all together".

By the looks on the others' faces, Harry understands that they've already decided to go and are just waiting for him to say yes too, so he does, even though he's not crazy about the idea. "Cool" he fakes a smile that the others seem to believe, maybe only Niall notices, but he doesn't say anything.

He comes back to reality when Zayn squeezes his cheeks with his fingers, he missed the sound of the bell as he was thinking about what to wear the next night. He gets a little sad when he looks up and sees that Louis is already gone.

Actually, his Friday at school goes by in a boring and normal way, so Harry is no longer so repulsed by the idea of the party during the day. That is until he finds himself, 17 hours after their conversation in front of school, holding a drunk Niall.

"Are you sure there wasn't a horse? I saw it" Niall puts his hands on Harry's shoulders, he's serious "I swear I saw it Harry".

Harry rolls his eyes, "No Niall, there was no horse. Now throw up". Niall nods and puts his face in the toilet again, after that Harry walks out to avoid throwing up too. He pulls out his phone as he leans against the door behind him, he sees it's 01:37, Niall has been throwing up for ten minutes now.

The only ones who didn't drink that night were him and Louis, who looked after Zayn while Harry was with Niall.

"Can we go back to the others?" the small voice of Niall comes to his ears surrounded by the music in the background. His hair is messed up and all over his eyes, Harry thinks he looks good like this, he almost looks like the bad boy of the movies, and the thought makes Harry laugh.

His ears hurt when they enter the living room. He wants to get out of there. Niall jumps into the couch next to Zayn, who is talking to Louis in front of him. Louis gives his full attention to Harry as the younger boy stands next to him, "Zayn feels a little better, is Niall okay?".

"He threw up". They both turn to their two friends sitting in front of them, Zayn has his head on Niall's shoulder, who is staring at a spot in the middle of the room. They both look for the spot the blonde is staring at, and find themselves looking at Liam and a girl -Harry guesses it's Maya- kissing.

Niall's face shows no emotion, which Harry thinks is kinda creepy. Unlike Niall, who continues to stare at them for a while longer, he gives the two their privacy and looks away. He finds himself watching another couple kissing, though, of which he only recognises the girl. His heart breaks a little when he sees that Louis is also looking in that direction. "Are you sad that she found someone else?" in Louis' eyes there is no sadness when he looks at Harry, maybe there is confusion, but it disappears when he looks one last time at Eleanor and then back at Harry.

"No, she had already found someone else the day after we broke up. Or maybe even before." Harry wants to hug him, but he isn't brave enough to do so, so they stay looking at each other without speaking.

"Listen, I'm sick of this party, can we leave?".

"You and I?".

Louis nods.

"What about the others?".

"I'll ask Stan if they can stay over, we can go to my house, it's not far from here".

"We just leave them here?". Harry feels guilty thinking about it, but that feeling disappears soon. He has wanted to leave that party ever since he set his foot in Stan's living room, and Louis wants to leave too, with Harry. The two of them. _Together_.

"C'mon, _Hazza_ ".

He loses it completely when his name escapes Louis' lips. He finds himself putting on his jacket a minute later, and when the cold air hits his cheeks, he realises how cold it is outside. The two of them stand looking at each other in the doorway for a few seconds, and normally Harry wouldn't do anything to break their eye contact, but he's freezing and probably Louis too. "Shall we go?" Louis nods and the curly follows him as he turns left, wondering why on this particular evening Louis is without his car.

There is silence between them for the first few minutes, Louis is the first who speaks, "Favourite colour?". Harry curls his eyebrows in confusion, but answers anyway "Blue," a second later, "yours?".

"I don't really have a preference, but if I have to choose maybe red".

"Is it my turn to ask a question now?", Louis nods. "When is your birthday?".

"On Christmas eve, yours?".

"First of February. Your turn".

"At what age did you have your first kiss?".

Harry laughs, "I was 14, you?".

"I was 14 too, but I win because I was 14 before you", Louis smiles, Harry rolls his eyes before asking "Favourite movie?".

"A classic, ' _Grease_ '".

"Mine is ' _The notebook_ ', obviously".

"I don't think I've ever seen it".

"What the fuck?", Harry stops in the middle of the road, which makes Louis laugh slightly, "Our friendship has to end here, you know that?".

Louis laughs again, but Harry shakes his head, "I'm not kidding, you're not allowed to talk to me".

"You're the one who is still talking to me", Harry stops again and flips Louis off, this only makes him laugh even more, and Harry finds himself rolling his eyes once again. Louis' laugh is real, there is nothing around them except for a few trees, but his laugh seems to bounce all over the place, everywhere. Harry wants to pick up his phone and record it.

He wonders how he and Louis ended up in the middle of the street at 2 a.m., but when he finds himself looking at the boy's smile in front of him, he stops worrying about the answer.

"I'll watch it if you can beat me".

"Beat you?". When Harry turns to Louis, he is already running. Harry starts running too, trying to catch up, he has no chance of beating him, zero, but he keeps trying anyway.

There are no cars around at this time, they are literally in the middle of the road, and they run and run, no one knows how long they do it, the light of the street lamps is the only thing that illuminates their faces besides the moonlight. The air that touches Harry's face is cold, but somehow he likes the feeling against his skin. He feels alive. _Free and alive_.

It's no longer a fight now, because it's obvious that Louis is going to beat Harry, but they still keep running, for maybe 5 minutes, maybe more, to Harry the concept of time seems a distant thing at that moment. Space and time are almost disappearing, and the only sound around them is the sound of their feet touching and touching the asphalt. Harry wonders if that is the only sound in the whole city, because everything else seems so quiet, so distant from them, as if they were in another universe at the moment.

When Harry stops, he is out of breath, and Louis, who arrived before him, starts laughing when he sees him. "That will be for next time Harold, no one can beat Louis Tomlinson", Harry replies simply by raising his middle finger again, trying to catch his breath. "Fuck you, Louis".

A giggle escapes Louis' lips, "Does the loser want a comforting hug?". He wraps his arms around Harry's stomach a moment later, he's still laughing when he sinks his face into the curly's neck, and Harry's heart stops beating when he feels Louis' warm breath on his skin. He wraps his arms around the body of the boy in front of him too, and Louis between laughs rubs his nose against his collarbone, which is sticking out from under his jacket. Harry closes his eyes, feeling Louis' hair just below his nose.

_Vanilla bath foam._

It's one of those ironic hugs you give someone after insulting them for 20 minutes, but Louis' body still feels so small in his arms, so Harry holds him tightly. He thinks their bodies fit each other perfectly, and he hopes Louis doesn't feel how fast his heart is going.

"Maybe we should go home now," when Louis pulls away from Harry, there's still a small smile on his lips. They keep asking each other questions on the way home, and five minutes later they find themselves in front of Louis' house, which Harry thinks looks a lot like his own. "I forgot my keys, can you climb a tree and get in through the window without making too much noise?". Louis points to a tree not far from them and Harry nods, although he's not too convinced he knows how to do it, "Yeah, I guess".

When their feet touch the floor, they both breathe a sigh of relief, the warm air seems to caress their cheeks. It wasn't easy to get up there as quietly as he had promised Louis, but he seemed to appreciate Harry's efforts anyway, who almost fell at least three times.

Soon the curly finds himself alone in Louis' room, who has gone to get something for both of them to drink. Without looking for anything in particular, he begins to look around, he runs his fingers over an open book on the desk whose title he can't see, and smiles when he sees photographs stuck on the wall. In one of them there are also Zayn and Liam, probably two years earlier, because Louis is wearing suspenders in the photo, and Harry remembers that when he first saw him, he was wearing them. There are also photos of Louis as a baby, which Harry finds adorable, and one with his four sisters, of whom he only recognises Daisy and Phoebe.

He stops thinking about it when Louis returns with two glasses of water in his hands. Harry's curiosity gets the better of him, so they somehow end up talking about Louis' soccer trophies that Harry saw on a shelf, then they end up talking about the photos he looked at earlier, then about the open book on his desk called " _Looking for Alaska_ ", then they get to talk about books in general.

After what seems like a long time to Harry, Louis is handing him a shirt and a pair of trousers. He can't help but admire Louis as he changes, he imagines being able to touch his perfect skin and every curve of his body. Louis' body isn't too muscular, but Harry loves it, and he takes a mental picture of it now that he has the chance.

"Harry, don't laugh at what I'm about to tell you," Harry hopes his cheeks are back to a normal colour as he turns to Louis. "I'm afraid of the dark and I usually leave a light on when I sleep".

Harry finds himself smiling, he stops feeling embarrassed, even when he feels Louis' body so close to his own. "I can't laugh because I'm afraid of the dark too."

"Then this will be our secret." Harry nods and his heart beats a little faster when he looks at Louis' smile. "How is it possible that after every party we always end up sleeping together and telling each other our secrets?".

Louis doesn't say anything for a while, just watches Harry silently, and then they find themselves talking about twenty different things again until they fall asleep almost at the same moment, Harry with a smile on his face.

He doesn't see it, but there's a small smile on Louis' lips too.


	5. Chapter 5

_I've got scars even though they can't always be seen; and pain gets hard, but now you're here and I don't feel a thing_

Waking up in Louis' bed, with Louis' clothes on and Louis' head so close to his, became Harry's new favourite thing.

He doesn't move, he doesn't want to wake Louis up, he looks like an angel while he sleeps, his cheeks are flushed and his mouth is slightly open. Harry stays admiring him without moving, he can't stop himself from running a finger through Louis' hair, he wraps it gently around his index finger, and he wants to touch every part of his face, but he doesn't, it would be creepy.

He looks away when the boy under him moves, and smiles when Louis rubs his nose on his shoulder before pulling away from him. "'Morning."

"Hey".

Seeing Louis with his hair falling over his forehead, almost covering his blue eyes, makes Harry think that he wants to wake up next to him every morning. Louis crinkles his eyes with the back of his hand before pulling himself up to sit down, looking a little lost, and somehow also adorable.

They don't say much to each other once they get out of bed, they wash their faces together and exchange a few words before going downstairs to have breakfast. Harry understands what Louis means about his house being noisy when they get to the end of the stairs. He seems to hear a thousand voices at once as he steps into the kitchen and is greeted by a shouted "Harry!". Daisy and Phoebe climb up his legs, Harry smiles and leans against the doorframe to keep his balance.

"Thanks for saying hi to me too girls" Louis rolls his eyes before leaning against the kitchen table, "Hey Lots". One of the two girls Harry saw in the picture in Louis' room the night before stops drinking her tea and looks at the scene questioningly.

"Lottie this is Harry, Harry this is my sister Lottie". This is followed by an exchange of handshakes and smiles, and when Harry sits down at the kitchen table, Phoebe sits on his lap.

"Where are mum and Fizzy?" Louis turns to Lottie, but he answers himself as he sees a note on the fridge and reads it in his mind. There is an exchange of silent glances between the two older siblings, Harry feels like he is interrupting something, so he decides to turn to Phoebe and Daisy, but he still notices the last worried look Louis gives his sister before pouring himself some tea. Louis never drinks coffee, Harry has noticed.

"Mum got some croissants this morning before she left, I think there's an extra one for Harry too". Lottie points to a bag on the table with her head and smiles at Harry, who smiles back. Phoebe gets up from his legs when Louis hands her a croissant.

"How was the party last night?" all five of them are sitting around the not too large table in the Tomlinson's kitchen, Harry between Phoebe and Louis.

"Zayn's parties are better".

"Zayn never throws parties".

"Well, without the one party he threw I wouldn't have met my curly haired friend who is standing here next to me". Louis runs a hand through Harry's hair, who tries not to enjoy the moment too much and remain with a normal expression on his face. He has no gel in his hair this morning, the night before he washed it quickly on Louis' sink removing almost every trace of the gelatinous mixture from his curls, which are now simply falling down his forehead. "Your hair looks good like that", Harry smiles before going back to chewing, hoping he hasn't blushed.

"Did you two meet at Zayn's last party?".

"Yeah, Harry is the same age as Zayn and Liam".

Lottie smiles at Harry, before asking his brother "You didn't drink last night, did you?". Louis stops chewing and looks at his sister for a moment before speaking, "No Lottie, of course not. You know that". Harry continues to eat his croissant in silence, thankfully Phoebe is calling him.

"I know Louis, I don't know why I asked, sorry". Louis shakes his head and smiles towards his sister to let her know it's okay. "Did you hear us come back?".

"What time did you two come back?". Louis and Harry exchange a confused look before Harry says "I think around 2 am" and Louis nods.

"Yeah, Jesus, I heard you. I'm surprised mum didn't wake up" the two exchange another glance before bursting out laughing, they had hoped that no one in the Tomlinson household had noticed their loud comeback.

The powered sugar from their croissants flies into their faces as they laugh. And that's probably the decisive point, because all five of them find themselves laughing twice as hard as before, so much that Louis' stomach hurts and tears starts coming down Harry's eyes.

They both go to the bathroom to wash their faces, and laugh again when they see their white faces. "I'll text Zayn later to see if the others are still alive." Harry nods, he hears something fall behind him, and they both look at each other in fear, the carpet is full of nail polish bottles, and Harry can already see Louis' death in front of his eyes. Their hands touch several times as they pick up the small bottles from the floor, and Louis whisper a "Thank God" when he sees that they are all still intact.

"Have you ever wondered why people like to wear these?".

Actually, little Harry, around 5 years old, had wondered so. He liked to watch Gemma change the colour of her nails every week, and one day he had asked her, he had asked her what was the point, the reason, of wearing nail polish. And Gemma had shown him just by putting it on his small nails.

He had his nails painted light blue, he really liked them, he had spent almost an hour looking at his hands after Gemma had finished. He had shown them to his mum happily, and she had simply looked at him smiling, as he told her that he couldn't wait to show his nails to Niall.

That was the first time Harry got a slap from his father, and it was also the last time he asked Gemma to paint his nails. Even after his father left his family, he never had the courage to ask again. But yes, he has thought about it, he has never said it though.

When he leaves his thoughts, Louis is staring at him questioningly. "Yeah. Yes, I've thought about it sometimes".

"Do you want to put it on?". Harry keeps staring at Louis in silence, he wants to, and he's never said it out loud since that time now more than ten years before, but yes, he wants to. He nods, and Louis motions for him to choose one of the nail polishes he's holding. Harry takes a light blue one -ironical- while Louis seems to think about it for a moment, he takes a black one and then grabs the light blue one from Harry's hands, who looks at him confused as he puts away the remaining nail polishes.

When they return to the kitchen, Louis' sisters are no longer there, and after they finish eating their half-finished croissants Louis brings the two nail polishes. "One colour is too classic, how about alternating them and doing one black and one blue?", Harry doesn't even have time to nod because Louis adds, "Maybe, I don't know, the ones I do black you could do blue and the ones I do blue you could do black?".

Harry stands for a moment looking at Louis, he seems excited, as he thinks how to paint the two colours "Sorry, that's stupid". Harry shakes his head, "No. I like what you said, we can alternate them".

"Yeah?", Harry nods again and motions for Louis to put his hand on the table. He applies the nail polish fairly quickly on his nails, Louis doesn't take long to apply it either, Harry thinks he's probably applied it to his sisters before. Once finished, Louis looks at Harry's nails and smiles, "This blue looks like the colour of my eyes".

"Yeah" Harry blushes a little, smiling when Louis grabs his hands and looks at the result of his work more closely.

"You said you liked the colour of my eyes the night we met".

"I didn't want to make you uncomfortable that night".

"I wasn't uncomfortable. You're cute when you're drunk". Harry puts all his attention on their hands, because he doesn't want to blush any more.

They're not touching by accident, Louis has taken his hands and is still holding them, he's running his fingers over Harry's, careful not to ruin their nail polish. They look at each other for a few seconds, silence between them, hands together. Harry feels sparks on his arms, his eyes still glued to Louis's. He wonders how they ended up so close, and if Louis is feeling the same sensation on his skin that Harry feels.

Countless seconds later, the first sound to reach Harry's ears is the ringing of his phone. He swallows the saliva he realises he has been holding in his mouth since his hands touched Louis', before answering Niall.

•••••

Harry rolls his eyes as he gets out of the car and his feet touch the yard outside his house. Gemma hugs him from behind and musses his hair, Harry tries to pull away but gives up when they get to the door and walk in together, Gemma still attached to his back. "I was kidding, Harry" Gemma leaves a kiss on his cheek at the same moment as they enter the living room, and Harry almost falls backwards.

"Mum!" Anne puts her two children in one big hug, Gemma fills her with kisses on the cheeks and Harry watches the scene smiling.

"When did you come back? You didn't even tell us".

"I wanted to surprise you but I didn't remember that you come home from school so early". Harry is so happy that he hugs her again when he finishes taking off his jacket.

"How are you?".

"Oh honey, I'm so tired. But finally I can stay home for a few days before leaving again".

The three of them find themselves smiling at each other, Gemma and Anne sitting in the sofa and Harry in a chair he has taken from the kitchen table. "How are you?".

Anne first turns to Gemma, who talks about her first few months of her last year of high school, then they end up talking about the high school graduation which is still 7 months away, and then they talk about the university where Gemma wants to go next year.

"What about you Harry, how are you?".

"Oh, I'm fine" Harry smiles slightly and looks at his hands, because he doesn't know what else to say and he's feeling embarrassed.

"How's school going?". "Everything is fine".

"How's Niall?". "He's fine".

Harry would like to ask his mum about her job, but Gemma adds for him, "He's also got some new friends now, you know mum?".

Anne smiles at Harry and motions for him to tell her more. "Uhm, their names are Zayn, Liam and Louis, the first two are my age while Louis is Gemma's age". Gemma coughs when Harry says Louis' name the second time, which makes Anne turn questioningly and Harry roll his eyes.

"Harry likes Louis".

"Gemma!". Harry covers his face with his hands and Gemma laughs, Anne looks at them confused. "He's embarrassed, but it's true, he has a crush on him".

"Did you tell mum about Ashton, Gemma?". Harry tries to change the subject, but Gemma flips him off, "Yeah, I already told her everything, so it's your turn now". Harry is embarrassed again, hiding his face with his hands and wishing he had Harry Potter's cloak of invisibility right now.

"Well? I want to know more about this Louis".

"I don't know, mum", Harry shakes his head "He's funny and, he doesn't smile so often but he-he's beautiful when he does" he doesn't tell her much after that, because as much as he could talk about Louis endlessly, he doesn't like to annoy others by constantly talking about him, especially right now when he's feeling his cheeks burning.

When Gemma finishes showing some pictures of Louis to Anne, which Harry actually objected to, there is a moment of silence in which they exchange smiles with each other. The smile on Harry's lips disappears when Anne speaks again and he hears that name come out of her mouth. "And, uhm, with Will?".

"Mum," Harry looks at her for a moment, "you know we haven't been friends for a long time".

"I know, but it's been a year and I thought you guys had made up".

"It's not about making up or not, stop asking me about him every fucking time".

Harry gets up from his chair and walks up the stairs so quickly that by the time he closes the door behind him, slamming it, of course, his heart has already started beating faster. He stops thinking about it when he sinks his face into his pillow and plays one of Louis' playlists, the sad one, of course.

Why? Why does his mum always have to remind him about Will every single time she comes home? Harry wants to scream, or slam the door ten more times, as if that will help him. He knows it would be useless anyway, so he stays staring at the ceiling while a song he's not even interested in listening plays in his ears.

The song that starts immediately afterwards calls his concentration back, he doesn't understand what the lyrics are saying, it's not an English song and Harry stares at the title for a few seconds, trying to figure out what language it is. He searches what the translation of " _Lunedì_ " is and find that it means Monday in Italian. He doesn't know why there is an Italian song on Louis' playlist, he is not understanding any of the words the singer is singing, but he can hear that the beat is sad. So he restarts it as soon as it finishes, and he searches the test.

> If you’re curious about the lyrics of the song, I made a translation of the chorus. (You don’t have to read it, it’s not significant in the story, I just wanted to translate it because if you search it on google you don’t find it)
> 
> The song is “Lunedì” by Salmo.
> 
> [chorus]
> 
> This is another Monday on a Saturday night  
>  So please, can you leave me alone?  
>  I feel like a wolf when it's a full moon  
>  I watch the storm destroy the pier  
>  Have you seen how bad the sea is in winter?  
>  Luckily I always wear sunglasses  
>  I don't want company even in hell  
>  People like me will die alone.
> 
> [a part of verse 2]  
>  This spin doesn't stop anymore  
>  It reminds me that this nightmare is real  
>  I'll make a hole in my head to fall down  
>  Just for the sake of hurting me.  
>  I sleep in God's cradle  
>  Lost between nothingness and the final goodbye  
>  I asked the Creator and he said "If you are looking for answers, there is a link on the bio".  
>  Happy for you that you have learned to smile  
>  I know it's funny, I don't know how to laugh  
>  With my heart in my throat I just want to live, write, die, live again

It makes him wonder if Louis knows Italian, so he actually picks up his phone to text him "Do you know Italian?" but he doesn't, because who the fuck asks that? So he just stays there, listening to music, until it's time for dinner, and then for bed.

The next morning, is Anne who takes Gemma and Harry to school. It seems that the conversation from yesterday never existed. The night before, they ordered food from their favourite Chinese restaurant for dinner, Harry came downstairs after spending almost 2 hours listening to music, and all the three of them had pretended that nothing had happened while they were eating.

Clearly, Harry continues to be annoyed, but he decides to forget the subject, or at least not to bring it up again with Anne, since she is only staying three days and he doesn't want to spend them making her feel uncomfortable.

He keeps thinking about it, though, and as soon as he gets out of the car, after saying goodbye to Gemma and Anne, he looks for the first time in months where Will usually is. And there he finds him.

He's not surrounded by as many people as Harry always imagined, just two guys, one blonde and one curly, Harry doesn't know them, but they remind him a lot of him and Niall. _Pathetic_. They're not even talking, Will is looking at his phone and Harry just stands there, staring at him from far away and thinking that until that day he hasn't seen him around that much, fortunately.

He gets a little sad when the bell rings, because he hasn't even seen his friends and he doesn't have any lesson with them until the third hour, when he will see Niall and Liam.

Time passes pretty quickly though, and when lunchtime arrives, he joins the others in the school canteen with Niall and notices Louis' absence when he sits down. He waits while the others start talking, looking around several times, until he finally asks "Where is Louis?".

"Right here". Harry turns to the voice behind him, he sees Louis' hand near his head, he was probably about to ruffle his hair, but he stopped before doing so. Harry is thankful for that, because as much as he can't get mad at Louis, he hates when people ruffle his hair. Louis seems to have noticed, which is why he stopped, and instead of doing so, he puts his hands back in his pockets before sitting down at the table.

"I had to stop by the locker room to talk to the coach, sorry". Harry smiles at him, he doesn't have to apologize, he wants to say so to him, but he just smiles. "Didn't want to mess up your hair, curly".

"Thanks for that", Harry smiles again, Louis smiles too. "I know why you put gel on your hair, without it you look cuter, but with it you look hotter. I know you're secret, Styles".

Harry wants to blush, but instead he says "Yeah, that's actually my secret, don't tell the others".

"Tell us what?". Niall asks, Harry and Louis giggle, before Louis says "Harry told me he was late this morning because he peed on his shoes". They all turn to Harry, who looks at Louis confused but nods, and that makes Louis laugh even more.

"Anyway, why were you late?".

"Uhm, nothing" Harry shakes his head, "My mum is home and she wanted to drive us".

"Your mum's home?", Harry nods. "Yeah, she surprised us yesterday, but she leaves again soon".

The conversation thankfully ends there, they all continue eating, until Louis says "I know it's early, but I was thinking about my birthday. I know you want to organize a big party, but I don't want one".

"Why?", Niall asks again, but this time Zayn is the one who answers "He prefers a small party because he says that it's too difficult to organise something big. And this is partly true because we already tried it last year, but most people were on holiday for the Christmas break".

"When is your birthday?".

"On Christmas Eve", Harry smiles, his friends don't notice, but it makes him somehow happy that he already knew the answer, he likes to know these little things about Louis.

Niall covers his mouth, so hard that some of the people at the table next to theirs turn to him, "Are you part of the circle of people who only get one present for Christmas and birthday?". They all burst out laughing, Niall, on other hand, seems to taking the conversation seriously.

Louis nods, he watches Niall with sad eyes, "Yes Niall, just one gift". Niall shakes his head, "I'm so sorry". Louis nods again, before a little smile appears on his lips.

"What do you want to do?", Liam is the first to speak when they finish laughing.

"Something just between us? My house is off limits, can we do it at yours, Zayn?".

"I don't know if my sisters will be back for Christmas".

"Well," they all turn to Niall, "I have to move into the new house and it will definitely be ready before Christmas, so on the 24th maybe you could come over and sleep there, then on Christmas morning everyone goes home to celebrate with their families".

"Perfect" Zayn turns to Louis as if he were asking him if it's okay. Louis nods, smiling, "Are you sure it's not a problem for you, Niall?".

Niall shakes his head, putting his arm around Louis' shoulders, "I'm sorry about your only gift, this is the least I can do". They all burst out laughing again, Zayn leaves a kiss on the blonde's cheek, who laughs and covers his face with his hands.

Harry stays there, watching the scene smiling, Niall continues to laugh and Zayn starts tickling him, while Liam adds laughs to the sound that is surrounding their table. Louis rests his head on Harry's shoulder, still smiling, and Harry is smiling too, happy. Happy to be there, with the four boys in front of him. He looks at them with adoration in his eyes, Will's name flashes through his mind for just a second, but he stops thinking about him immediately, like he had done until yesterday during the previous months.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi everyone! sorry it took me so long, I’m really sorry.  
> thank you for the reads and kudos, seriously.  
> enjoy your reading :)

_Pay attention, I hope that you listen_   
_'Cause I let my guard down_   
_Right now I'm completly defenceless_

So. Louis didn't come to school on Friday, but he texted Harry during his 'absence', which made the curly happy. Especially when Louis called him on Saturday night and they stayed on the call for almost two hours. Harry fell asleep with Louis' voice still in his ears.

He has spent the weekend with Gemma and his mum, Will hasn't been brought up again and Harry is grateful for this. Today is Anne's last day at home and Harry would like to spend it differently, and maybe doing something with his mum, but the two tests he has tomorrow are stopping him from doing so.

He has basically finished studying biology when Anne comes into his room and sits on his bed. Harry sits with her, welcomed into his mother's arms, who leaves a kiss on his forehead. They stay like that for a while and neither of them says anything, until Anne breaks the silence, "I hope that I can come home for Christmas and celebrate with you and Gemma".

Harry pulls away to look at her, "You always come back for Christmas".

"I know, honey. I hope I can make it this year too, it's been a bit of a mess at work lately". Harry nods, he just hopes he can spend Christmas with his mum like he does every year, he has even already thought of a present to give her.

Since his left them, Christmas hasn't been the same, it's become just a normal day for Harry. But, ever since Anne started working as a journalist, and Harry stopped seeing her for weeks, he waits for Christmas to arrive so that he can finally spend time with his family, Gemma and his mum.

"I wanted to apologise for asking you about Will the other day, I'm sure you don't like talking about him and it wasn't my intention to force you to do so".

"It's okay". Anne caresses his hair, and Harry just wants to disappear into her arms, without thinking or caring about anything.

"Listen, would you like to invite Niall and his family over for dinner tonight? Since I haven't seen Maura in a long time, and you could stay with Niall". Harry nods and Anne smiles at him, leaving a kiss on his forehead as she stands up. "Do you want to invite your other friends too?".

"Mum". Harry shakes his head, it would be awkward, he knows Anne would make it awkward, he just knows it. His mother is still standing in the doorway, she rolls her eyes before adding "You can eat a pizza here in your room, I won't say anything to make you uncomfortable with Louis, don't worry". Harry keeps looking at her in silence, shaking his head again, but he's actually smiling, and Anne has a small smile on her lips too.

"Okay, fine".

"Okay", Anne repeats before leaving.

Harry lies there for a while with his face on the pillow, he doesn't have Louis' hoodie on, and Harry misses his perfume. He wants to see him, so he finds himself in Louis' contact and starts the call.

"Hello?".

"Hi Louis".

"Hi Harry".

"Hi", Harry runs a hand through his hair. "I wanted to ask you if you, uhm, wanted to come over, like, I don't know, in an hour? Or half an hour, and have dinner here maybe. The others too, if you guys want. My mum is also at home with Niall's parents actually, so I don't know if you guys want to come, but, yeah, I mean Niall is coming so I wanted to ask you too, and Zayn and Liam".

Harry hears Louis laughing slightly on the other end of the phone, "Do you miss me that much?".

Harry chuckles, he can't see him, but he hears Louis smiling on the other end of the phone. "Can I come over there right now?".

Harry nods, only to clap a hand on his forehead when he realises Louis can't see him. "Yes, do you remember where I live?".

"I don't have such a short memory, Harry". Louis chuckles again, for the third time since Harry started the call, and the curly smiles, his cheeks pressed against the pillow. "Are you picking up the others as well?".

"Yes, I'll call them now and pick them up, we'll be there in 10 minutes".

Harry smiles again, and he's thankful that Louis isn't already there, because he's blushing and hiding with his face in his pillow.

He gets up so he can tidy his room and fix his hair a bit before the others arrive. He sticks his head out of his bedroom door and yells to his mum that his friends are coming, which is followed by some comment from Anne that Harry ignores.

The doorbell rings precisely ten minutes later like Louis has said, and Harry is thankful the he arrived before Anne at the door, who stands behind him anyway with a smile on her face. Harry rolls his eyes, _embarrassing_.

He smiles when he sees his three best friends outside the door -Niall will be here later-. They put their shoes and jackets where Harry points them once they enter, what comes next is an exchange of awkward looks in silence, until Anne speaks, "Hey guys, I'm Anne, Harry's mum".

"Nice to meet you, I'm Zayn" Zayn extends his hand, smiling. "Hi, I'm Liam," same handshake, and finally, "I'm Louis, it's nice to meet you".

"Oh honey, my pleasure". Louis smiles at her, Harry can't tell if there's embarrassment in his eyes or if he's smiling at her genuinely, but either way, he ends that awkward moment by saying "Okay mum, we're going".

His friends sit in his room without any problems, which makes Harry happy for some strange reason, the fact that there is no awkwardness and that they feel like at home makes him particularly happy.

"You have a tree outside your window too", Louis looks out Harry's bedroom window, the curly follows him and stands beside him, Zayn and Liam stay on Harry's bed talking about who knows what. "Yeah, but I don't usually climb it".

"I noticed you weren't good at it", Louis smiles before sitting down on the edge of the window. Harry shakes his head, laughing, his curls end up in front of his eyes in the process, without any hair gel they're long enough to almost cover his cheeks, hiding the slightest bit of embarrassment that formed on his face thinking back to the night they climbed into Louis' room and Harry literally sucked at it.

"How long is your mum staying?".

"She leaves tomorrow morning before lunch".

"Are you sad?".

"A little". Louis puts a hand on his shoulder and squeezes it lightly, as a sign of support, Harry supposes. "And you, I mean, how are you? You didn't come to school on Friday".

"Niall!" they both turn towards the door when they hear Zayn shout the blonde's name, who is actually standing in the doorway. "I didn't know I was so expected", Niall smiles before throwing himself into Harry's bed next to Zayn, "What's for dinner, Harry?".

"I ordered pizza for everyone before you arrived, is that okay?".

A strange sound comes out of Niall's lips, which Harry imagines is an orgasm, if he was sleeping with Niall and he orgasmed like that Harry would probably be scared, but the thought of having sex with Niall doesn't attract him that much so he stops thinking about it. His best friend starts to kiss his cheeks, Harry tries to push him away from his face, but a moment later he also feels Zayn's lips on his skin. He hears Louis and Liam laughing in the background as Zayn and Niall continue to attack him with kisses on his cheeks and forehead.

Harry starts running as soon as he can get away from the two, who start running too laughing. Harry's room is not that big, so they are not really running, but they still keep trying to catch up with Harry.

Louis gets in front of him at one point, Harry is pressed against the wall, laughing against Louis' neck, who is also laughing.

"Don't defend him, Louis!".

Louis laughs again, turning to Harry and wrapping his arms around his body, lifting him off the ground until they reach the curly's bed, where he drops him. "Louis! You betrayed me! Like that!", is what Harry manages to say before being attacked again by Zayn and Niall.

The whole thing ends with the five of them lying on Harry's bed, they're all laughing, the curly has Zayn on one side and Niall on the other, who are probably in tears at the moment.

"Sorry I switched sides, Hazza," Louis smiles at him before leaving a kiss on his cheek, he lays back down beside Liam a moment later. Harry closes his eyes, still trying to catch his breath after running from Zayn and Niall, the butterflies he feels in his stomach that won't stop moving aren't helping him, though.

•••••

"Absolutely not Niall".

"Please?" Zayn shakes his head again. "Please, Zayn?", Niall gives Zayn a kiss on the cheek.

He lifts him up by his legs and starts running to Louis' car with the blonde in his arms. Louis, Harry and Liam watch the scene laughing, so much that by the time they get to the car, Harry is out of breath.

"Did you convince him in the end?". Niall looks at Zayn smiling, who rolls his eyes "Yeah, he convinced me somehow". The blonde gives another kiss on Zayn's cheek, before they walk together towards Niall's house -who lives near their school, for now-.

The other three instead get into Louis' car, since they weren't forced by Niall to tutor him in maths today, and leave towards Liam's house. The stop-offs are always the same, first Liam, then Zayn and finally Harry, who has now become a daily customer of the Tomlinson transport service.

"Did your mum leave?". When Liam gets out of the car and Louis and Harry are left alone, the boy who's driving turns to the curly. He looks at the time on his phone screen, "almost two hours ago".

"Do you want to stop somewhere and get something to eat? I don't know, McDonald's, maybe?".

"Sure".

Louis starts the car towards the nearest McDonald's, he and Harry didn't talk much at school today, Louis seemed to be on another planet, and Harry didn't interfere by asking him strange questions. He still seems to be on another dimension actually, as he keeps his hands on the wheel and looks carefully at the road.

Harry is watching him, and when Louis returns his gaze as they stop at a set of traffic lights, Harry says a small 'sorry' before turning to the window. He takes a quick glance in the rear view mirror and sees Louis smiling slightly, which makes Harry smile -and blush- as well.

"Hey Harry, can we do McDrive and go to your place?".

"Uhm, upstairs Gemma is with her boyfriend doing I don't want to know what and downstairs the plumber is doing some work in the kitchen, shall we go to your place?".

Louis stares at Harry in silence for a moment before shaking his head slightly and looking back at the road. "Never mind, let's get the food and stay there".

When their eyes meet again, there is a different emotion in the blue eyes of the boy next to Harry, his pupils are more dilated than before, he looks almost scared, lost. His gaze seems to dart faster between the cars they are passing, as if he's looking for something to hold on to, something to look at other than Harry.

"What's wrong?".

"Mh?".

"What's going on, Louis?".

"Nothing, stop it".

Louis doesn't say anything else, he concentrates back on the road in silence, neither of them saying anything until they arrive in front of the McDonald's. Harry orders for both of them while Louis looks for a table, it's pretty full for a Monday afternoon, but they still manage to find a seat and sit down. Because of the long queue, their orders probably won't come so quickly and Harry snorts, Louis on the other hand looks calm, relieved, and the curly notices that he's been eating his nails since they walked in.

"Louis" Harry speaks first after minutes of silence, his voice is calm and gentle, and when Louis looks up at him he seems more serene than before in the car. "Don't you want to go home?".

For a moment Harry is afraid that Louis will get up and leave, but instead he throws his head back, looking up at the ceiling with his neck resting against the seat of the chair he is sitting in.

"Let's start with the fact that my house is really noisy and sometimes I need to get away from my family, okay?" Harry nods and Louis sighs, because that's not the reason this time.

"And my father, who's not really my father, Mark, yeah, he's at home. And we don't get along very well".

Their food arrives -it took less time than Harry thought it would, maybe because their orders are quick to prepare- and Louis immediately starts to eat to avoid the subject further. He wipes his mouth, some of the mustard from his triple cheeseburger has gone over his lips, and looks at Harry in silence.

"It's not a good situation for my family lately".

Harry decides to stop asking questions, since he has known Louis he has learned how secretive he can be and how uncomfortable he feels talking about certain topics; he only talks about them if he wants to, and Harry doesn't want to force him. Anyway, he doesn't break eye contact with him, and Louis doesn't interrupt it either.

Hours later, even though it was only seconds, Louis looks down and sighs. "My mum and Mark divorced almost a year ago, he's not my biological dad but he was the one who raised me, so let's just say I could consider him that. When he and mum divorced, he went to live in another town and we almost completely lost contact with him. But now my grandma is sick and the money to pay for the operation is a lot, so Mark sold his house to get some extra money and now he's staying with us temporarily until he finds somewhere else to go".

Louis pauses to catch his breath, taking a bite of his cheeseburger, "I love being with my family, and I know that's bad to say, but since Mark left, I feel like my home is a safe place. And now that he's with us I feel like I'm back in that existential crisis period I had in middle school, when I tried to spend as little time as possible at home and I was always fighting with my parents". He takes another bite, "I even had to miss school on Friday because we helped Mark with the moving thing".

"Oh", Harry can't say anything else for a few seconds, he searches in his mind for something to say but all the informations Louis just gave him starts to mix in his head and he simply says, "I'm so sorry".

Louis smiles weakly at him, and goes back to eating his cheeseburger like nothing happened. Harry wants to do the same, but he feels like shit about the minimal response he gave Louis, so he shakes his head and tries to reorder his mind.

"I'm sorry about your grandma, I hope it's nothing serious, and I'm sorry you feel like this at home, if you need to you can come to me anytime, okay?". Louis smiles at him and nods slightly, his cheeks starting to turn red and he utters a small "thank you" before returning to his cheeseburger.

They eat in silence, Louis is the first to finish, and he continues to give Harry small smiles every now and then, which the curly reciprocates and makes his heart beat faster each time.

People waiting for a table so they can sit down are probably hating them, because even when they finish their hamburgers they still sit there talking and laughing. Harry orders a muffin after a while so they don't get kicked out of the restaurant, but Louis ends up eating more than half of it, so they order two more which they decide to share, until two hours have passed since they sat there, and Harry is a little sad when he gets home.

•••••

Two days after going out with Louis, Harry almost jumps out of his chair when he hears a knock on his bedroom window. At first he looks around confused, because he doesn't immediately understand where the sound is actually coming from. When he looks up at the window, he sees Louis.

He's confused for a second before getting up from his chair and letting the older boy in. "Louis, what the fuck?".

"Doors are overrated", Louis takes off his jacket and hangs it on Harry's desk chair, "Sorry I didn't tell you, are you busy?".

Harry looks around confused, "I should finish some English homework".

"Can I stay here while you finish them?", the curly continues to be confused, is Louis really in his room right now? Ne nods, and Louis lies down on his bed as if he were at home. Harry sits back down in front of his English exercise and tries to concentrate on it, but the only thing he's thinking about is that his bed will smell of Louis later, since the boy is lying on it at the moment.

When he feels Louis' eyes on him, his cheeks begin to heat up and he starts writing random words on the paper in front of him so that his embarrassment won't be noticed too much. His hand freezes when he thinks about the clothes he's wearing at the moment.

 _Shit_.

After that day at the park, Harry has started using the hoodie Louis gave him as a kind of pajama, putting it on when he got home from school and sleeping in it at night. It still smells like Louis even though Harry washed it, and it's warm.

Now. Of course Louis -if he hasn't done so already- will recognise his hoodie, it's his after all. At that point Harry can't think of anything else, and his English paper seems to him to be nothing more than messy words.

_God, please make me disappear._

He runs a hand through his hair and coughs, "Well, uhm, I can finish my homework tonight". As he gets up from his chair and goes to sit on the bed, Louis looks up from his phone and pulls himself up to sit.

"Did something happen, Louis?".

"Nothing in particular, I just needed to get out of my house, do you want me to leave?".

Harry shakes his head, "No, no, I just wanted to make sure you were okay". Louis smiles at him, and after Harry smiles back, he starts looking around and stands up. Harry watches him while he walks into his room, Louis turns to him smiling a few minutes later when he stops in front of a shelf above his desk, in his hands he is holding a Polaroid camera. "I saw it the other day, I always wanted a blue one when I was a kid".

When he sits down next to Harry he looks at the polaroid trying to get the lens out, and the curly takes it from his hands after Louis touches the wrong button. Their hands are still together when Louis points the camera at them.

"Seriously? Louis Tomlinson wants a picture taken with a measly polaroid?" Harry shakes his head laughing, but Louis slaps him on the thigh. "Yes Harold, I want a picture. With you".

Harry nods, his voice suddenly becoming shy and he whispers a small "okay", they still have their hands on Harry's white polaroid, Louis' hand on top of Harry's, and he doesn't take it off when he points the lens at them again. The curly looks at Louis, who wrinkles his nose and sticks out his middle finger, Harry improvises by putting his index and middle fingers in a V as Louis takes the picture. A few seconds later the picture comes out and Harry grabs it with his free hand, putting it to his side to let it develop, "Now I want one too".

Louis rolls his eyes, imitating Harry, but a second later goes back to looking at the camera, this time with his tongue out and Harry follows him doing the same pose. Once Louis has taken the picture, Harry places the picture next to the one they took earlier, which has now developed.

He lets go of the camera -and Louis' hand- when he takes the photo to get a closer look, he smiles, and Louis bursts out laughing. "Look at your face".

"Hey! There's nothing wrong with my face!" Harry hits him on the arm and Louis laughs even harder. His face is actually funny, but only because when Louis took the picture Harry was caught unprepared. "Can you stop laughing?".

Louis shakes his head and Harry rolls his eyes. He hits him on the arm again, Louis stops laughing and his face becomes serious, "You didn't really do that". At this point Harry chuckles and hits him again.

"Stop it, Harry".

"Mhh, nop".

So. They find themselves fighting on Harry's bed, but almost immediately their fight turns into a tickling contest. Clearly Louis is winning, Harry is laughing so hard that he finds himself lying underneath Louis.

Louis stops tickling him and Harry tries to catch his breath, although the giggling of the boy on top of him is not helping him to stop laughing. When Harry catches his breath, Louis moves some curls from his forehead with his index finger and looks at him smiling.

They look into each other's eyes and, that's it. For maybe several seconds, or maybe minutes, maybe hours? Or days? It was only seconds, but when Louis moves to take the now developed second photo, it seems like a long time has passed to Harry.

"Here".

He grabs the picture from Louis' hands, there are the two of them both with their tongues out, and they laughs when he looks at their faces.

"Beautiful, isn't it?" Harry nods. "It's the two subjects that make it so beautiful", they both smile, returning to lie down next to each other.

God, can he like Louis that much?


	7. Chapter 7

_I can feel your heart inside of mine_  
_I've been going out of my mind_  
_Know that I'm just wasting time_

Niall and Harry have the hour before lunch free today, they spend it in the library, trying to study for the test they'll have tomorrow. Of course, they don't, and even though it's still ten minutes before the bell ring, they go and sit in the school canteen at their usual table to wait for the others.

"When are you moving into the new house?", Harry is the one who speaks first when they are sitting across from each other.

"We can move in a week, but my dad wants to make some changes so we'll have to wait a little longer before it's completely ready. In fact, I wanted to ask you and the others if you could help us repaint the rooms so we can finish sooner, since my dad doesn't want to call a painter".

"Of course, I think the others will help as well". The canteen is slowly starting to fill up, despite the fact that it's still several minutes before lunchtime. Harry can see that Niall is hungry -when isn't he?- but he isn't exactly thinking about food at the moment, another thought keeps buzzing through his mind.

"Hey Ni," Niall, who has started looking around, shifts his gaze back to Harry, "did you ever talk to Will after, well, that time?".

Niall shakes his head, "Nop. You?".

"No, but, I don't know, I thought about him a few days ago".

"Did he do something to you?".

"No. No, it's just that my mother asked me about him last week and I've been thinking about him a bit these days, do you ever miss him?".

Niall shakes his head once more, his eyes glued to Harry's, "No, I don't miss someone who doesn't know the meaning of friendship".

Harry sighs and runs a hand through his hair before looking back at Niall. "We have great friends now, don't we?".

Niall smiles and nods quickly, "Yeah. Really great, Harry".

"Thank you for choosing me that day and not Will".

"I didn't choose between you and him, Harry. What he did completely ended our friendship, I stood by your side and Will should have too, what he did to you was" Niall pauses, maybe he doesn't know what word to use "disgusting. It was disgusting".

The sound of the bell hits their ears, and Harry directs a smile at his blonde best friend, "Thanks anyway".

Niall and Harry met Will in first grade, and after the first time they spoke that day in the school gym, they became an inseparable trio.

Inseparable in the truest sense of the word, Harry has no memories of his childhood that don't include Will and Niall. Whatever he experienced in his young life, he experienced it with them, and Harry always liked that. Harry loved his two best friends, when he was with them, the rest didn't seem to matter.

There is one memory though, which is from eighth grade, that even Niall doesn't know anything about.

It can be said that Niall probably had a different girlfriend every week during middle school, apparently the girls were crazy about his blue eyes and blonde hair, unlike Harry's curls. However, I don't know how 'important' a middle school relationship of less than a week might be considered, but at the time that thing upset Harry. Not the fact that Niall had a lot of girlfriends, but that not a single one of them liked him. Now Harry would probably call himself stupid if he thinks about it again, but it was really an important thing in his eyes at the time, he was desperate, so much that one day he and Will decided to kiss.

So. Harry's first kiss was with Will, and the next kisses he gave were also with him. They were simple kisses they gave each other every now and then, when they were both lonely, you know, which Harry never gave importance to and they didn't tell anyone about.

The ' _thing_ ' became stupid in their eyes a few months later, so they decided to stop. And one day, when they had already started high school, they ended up thinking about it and they laughed at the thought. Harry has archived that ' _thing_ ' without any problem, not that he'd ever given any importance to those little kisses, he didn't like Will in that way, so he'd never given any importance to what they did.

When Harry saw Louis for the first time, Will was with him. And when Harry started searching for information about Louis and looking more and more where he was in the corridors, Will was with him.

But maybe, Will hadn't realised that Harry's was clearly a crush, and when they were at Niall's house one evening -like they always used to do- and Harry had ended up talking about Louis all evening, that's when Will understood. He finally understood what Niall had already understood for weeks, and when Harry finally admitted that yes, he did like the boy with blue eyes who played football, the reactions of his two best friends were... different.

The fact that one of his two best friends could be grossed out by him just because he liked a boy, was never an option for Harry. Not only did Will make him feel like shit for weeks, with comments that Harry didn't like and that Will kept making anyway, but he was also the reason for Harry's first black eye.

When Will started insulting Harry, he and Niall ended their friendship, but neither of them would have expected that a few weeks later, Will could beat up Harry during the last party before summer break.

They haven't spoken since that day. Zero. Not a word.

Niall would never abandon Harry, how could he, he was happy that Harry liked someone and he had always been there for him. But Harry had sometimes thought that maybe Niall would be better with Will, and that if he had never had a crush on a boy, their trio would still be inseparable.

A hand slams on the table and Harry comes back to reality, he jumps from the chair and Zayn, the one who slammed the hand on the table, laughs seeing the scene. "You two, tomorrow night sleepover at my house".

"Sleepover?" Niall laughs and Zayn cups his mouth with his hand, the blonde starts to lick it but Zayn continues to hold it there impassively. "Yeah Nialler, sleepover, because there will be snacks, video games and gossip, alright?" Niall laughs when Zayn finally takes his hand out of his mouth and sits beside him smiling.

•••••

"Liam, pass me the bottle".

Liam turns to Zayn and stops chewing, "Where's my 'please'?". Zayn rolls his eyes, "Whatever Li, please?", Liam smiles and hands him the bottle of coke -they've decided # _noalcoolnight_ \- that's next to him.

Harry and Louis are sitting next to Zayn in his bed, while Niall and Liam are sitting on the floor in front of them. "Can we play?" Liam points with his head to the Play Station behind him, and Zayn nods going to turn it on. "You and Niall can start", Zayn holds out the two joysticks to Niall and Liam.

Zayn sits on a swivel chair next to Niall and Liam, who are still sitting on the floor, so only Harry and Louis are left on his bed. Neither of them speak anyway, they listen to the others argue over which game to choose and laugh when Zayn takes control of the situation and starts a random game for Niall and Liam.

Louis throws himself backwards on the bed until his entire back lies perfectly on the mattress as they start the game, Harry follows him with his gaze, "Are we the only ones who don't like video games, Harry?".

The curly nods, "Apparently", and Louis sits up again before resting his head on Harry's legs. Louis looks up at him, and Harry tries to look back at him while remaining impassive, but the only thing he can think of is Louis' head on his thighs. He moves a tuft of hair from his forehead with his index finger, and only after doing so he feel his cheeks heat up. He breaks eye contact with Louis out of embarrassment, but when he looks down again, he sees the boy smiling at him.

"You can play with my hair, if you want, I don't mind".

Harry wants to sink his face into a pillow and scream, because his heart is beating so fast he can almost feel it coming out of his chest. He runs a hand through Louis's hair, it's soft and longer than it was a few weeks ago, now it falls in front of his forehead if Louis doesn't fix it with his hand every now and then. He continues to gently touch his hair, Louis' eyes are closed, and when Harry moves his hand, his head follows it slightly, almost as if it were a cat eager to be petted.

When Harry feels his cheeks heat up once more, he looks away again from the boy beneath him. In front of him he finds Zayn's eyes, who is watching the scene, smiling, and Harry blushes even more when Zayn raises his eyebrows and points at Louis with his head. So Harry finds himself watching Niall and Liam play, and after a while he also feels Louis turn his head in their direction.

He completely loses track of time, he keeps playing with Louis' hair for what seems like hours to him, even though it's only until the end of Niall and Liam's game. Once the game is over, Zayn switches with Liam, who throws himself on top of Louis, causing Harry's hand to move away from his hair. Louis starts hitting Liam, who starts laughing and hitting Louis in turn.

"What's happening on my bed?" Zayn gives a quick glance behind him before looking at the screen again, as he can't pause the game, "Harry, Louis, have you moved on to touching other parts of your body?".

Harry turns to Louis expecting to find him as shocked as he is, but instead finds him laughing. Louis gives Zayn his attention for just one second to tell him to shut up, before grabbing a pillow and hitting Liam in the face. Liam's reaction makes Harry burst out laughing, and he laughs even harder when Liam grabs a pillow too and hits Louis in the face.

"Guys?" Zayn speaks again, but none of them respond because Louis also hits Harry, who in turn takes a pillow and hits him in the face. A real pillow war has now started between the three. Niall gives up shortly after and takes his attention away from the game so he can turn to look at the scene behind him, his laugh filling the room as his eyes settle on the three boys.

"A pillow fight without me and Niall!" Zayn hands a pillow to Niall, "Ni, let's get revenge". Zayn hits Louis while Niall attacks Harry and Liam, they continue to hit each other for probably over ten minutes and only stop when Liam yells "Okay okay, enough! I give up".

Niall sighs throwing himself on the bed and sinking his face into the pillow, "Me too". He bursts out laughing shortly after, and the others follow. Harry almost thanks Liam for making them stop, because Louis is on top of him and their faces are so close that Harry is dying to reach out and kiss him. Especially when their eyes meet, Harry doesn't even know how he can stop himself from joining his lips with Louis'.

"Hi Hazza".

"Hi Lou".

Louis smiles at the curly before standing up and extending a hand to him, which Harry grabs and uses to help himself up and sit down.

"I told you Niall it was a real sleepover, there was even a pillow fight". Niall raises his hands and nods, Zayn attacks him again and makes him laugh so hard that his laught fills the room.

More than three hours later, when it's almost 3 am and Liam has -literally- fallen asleep in Zayn's arms, they decide to go to sleep. Louis is sleeping next to Harry, and the curly turns his body towards him when Zayn turns off the light. Louis is also facing Harry, his eyes closed and the curly looks at him for a few seconds smiling, although Zayn has turned off the light, in the room you can still see something.

Harry thinks back to the conversation he had with Louis a few weeks earlier about them both being afraid of the dark, and he smiles, because he thinks Louis won't have any problem falling asleep since there's some light in the room.

Harry closes his eyes at the same time as Louis opens his for a second, hoping that the boy in front of him hasn't noticed his gaze on him. When he opens them again shortly after, he fortunately sees Louis with his eyes closed again, but this time with a small smile on his lips.

This, though, is not what Harry sees the next morning when he wakes up.

He doesn't see Louis next to him. and when he turns in the direction of Zayn's bed, he doesn't see him either.

He thinks for a moment that his friends have woken up and left without him, but when he starts to look around he sees Niall and Liam still sleeping not too far from him. He's hoping to find a message from Louis when he picks up his phone, but all he finds is a message from Gemma asking when he'll be back.

He starts looking at twitter for a bit, until he hears Niall wake up and turn to him. "'Morning Ni".

"Hey, where are the others?". Harry sits up and shrugs, "They weren't there when I woke up".

"I think I heard them leave about 20 minutes ago", when Liam speaks, Niall and Harry both jump into place and it causes a laugh from Liam.

"You were awake all this time?", Liam finally opens his eyes and turns to Harry, nodding. "Do you know where they went?".

"I just heard Louis wake up Zayn, then they went out".

Niall drops his interest in the two boys and changes the subject, they stay there talking for a while, Harry realises that he's never really talked to Liam seriously, he's a genuine and nice person, and Harry makes a mental note to try and get to know him better.

His hair is sticky, he went to bed with gel still in his hair the night before, and now his fingers are almost stuck in his curls as he runs his hand through them. And it's even worse when he looks at his reflection in the mirror, his hair is stuck to his forehead -stuck in the truest sense of the word- and his curls seem to be flattened down. "Guys! You talked to me for ten minutes while my hair looked like that?!" Niall and Liam bring their attention back to Harry, who is looking at them with his eyes almost wide open, which causes a laugh from both of them.

Niall and Liam follow him into the bathroom when he goes to wash his hair and face in Zayn's sink, the blonde tries to splash him with water several times, only giving up when Harry splashes him in turn, both looking like they've just stepped out of the shower when they decide to head downstairs.

Liam seems to know every corner of Zayn's house -as does Louis-, and Harry remembers the morning after Zayn's party where he met Louis, and later the others.

"Should I call Zayn?" Niall pulls out his phone, but as he brings it to his ear, Louis and Zayn walk through the kitchen door.

"Oh, you're awake" Zayn musses Niall's hair as he walks in followed by Louis, who is holding a plastic bag in his hand. "We went to get breakfast while you were asleep, chocolate muffins for everyone", Louis holds up the bag in his hand and Harry smiles at him, but the older boy doesn't seem to notice.

Niall gets up from his chair with a snap and hugs Louis and Zayn, "God bless you". Louis smiles at the blonde, holding him close a little longer.

"Hey you two". Louis musses first Liam's hair then Harry's, beside whom he stops. "Why is your hair wet?".

"Uhm, I washed them", Louis starts to wrap his curls between his fingers, looking up at them as he rolls them around his skin, not that he's much shorter than Harry, but he's looking up anyway, and Harry thinks he's so pretty, with his lashes up and his pupils following the movements of his hand. Harry just wants to bring Louis closer to him, so that their bodies are touching, and lean into him, until their lips meet and he can finally feel the sensation of being able to kiss Louis.

"Did you sleep well?".

"Well, for sleeping on the floor, I'd say yes", Harry smiles slightly at him, Louis does the same before going to sit next to Zayn as Harry watches him hand out a muffin to everyone.

"Are you coming to watch me play tomorrow afternoon?", for a second Harry wonders why Louis has a game on a Sunday afternoon and not on a Friday night as always, but nods when he sees the others do so too.

The five of them spend the rest of the morning not doing much, as they usually do, until lunchtime when Harry jumps into Louis' car and is driven home with Niall and Liam.

•••••

The next day, Harry waits for the end of the game more impatiently than usual, because at the end of each game Louis gives each of them a hug, and Harry wants a hug from Louis right now.

When the game ends and Louis joins them in front of his car as he does every time, he gives his usual series of hugs. A smile forms on Harry's lips when he holds him close for just a second, especially when Louis musses his hair before pulling away.

"Good game, Lou".

"Thanks Zayn" Louis blows him a flying kiss and puts his football bag away in the boot of his car. "Are you guys busy right now? Can we all do something together?".

"I can't, I have to finish a chemistry research for tomorrow".

"We have a chemistry research?" Niall almost screams as he turns to Liam. "Yeah?", Liam laughs, but when he sees the panic in Niall's eyes he stops, "Ni, don't worry, do you want me to help you?". Niall nods shyly and Liam smiles at him.

Louis turns to Zayn and Harry waiting for an answer. "My grandparents are coming over for dinner later and I have to help my mum, I'm sorry", Zayn ruffles Louis' hair, "Can't we just go out tomorrow?".

Louis turns towards the curly, he almost seems to communicate something to Harry with his gaze, and in fact Harry understands. He needs to be out of his house, and Harry actually has nothing to do, so he says "I'm free". He says it with a smile, he can't help it, and Louis smiles at him in turn, stepping closer to Harry and moving a curl from his forehead.

His other hand has settled between Harry's shoulder and neck, it's just resting there, but it's almost as if Louis doesn't want the curly to move away from him. As if Harry could ever move away from him. Their faces are so close that Louis rubs his nose against Harry's before leaving a kiss on his cheek and whispering a quick "Thank you" in his ear, pulling away from him.

Louis leans his back against his car, there's a moment of silence before the conversation restarts. If Harry could fly he probably would, but he just stands there, pretending not to be feeling a thousand emotions inside. He sees Niall and Zayn smiling at him out of the corner of his eye, but promises himself not to turn towards them, he doesn't want to blush even more.

After they have said goodbye to the others, it is only Louis and Harry, the curly's cheeks are still red as they get into the car. "Can we go to your place?".

"'Course, I don't think anyone's home". Louis nods before turning back to look at the road, "Oh, I actually just wanted to see Gemma, you know". Harry shakes his head smiling, he probably won't be able to stop smiling for a while after what happened earlier.

Once inside, Louis takes off his shoes and throws himself into the sofa as if it were his own home, which makes Harry smile, again. "Do you want something to eat?" Louis nods slightly and to Harry he looks like a kid being asked by Santa at the mall if he's been good during the year. He looks for something he can prepare while Louis continues to watch him from the living room, he is lying on his stomach in Harry's sofa, his chin resting on the armrest and his legs behind him.

The curly wonders if he should ask what he wants to ask and probably ruin the atmosphere that has been created, he decides to do it anyway, "Is something wrong?".

Their eyes meet and remain glued together for a few seconds, immersed in the silence of the Styles' house, and even when Louis shakes his head slightly, neither of them look away.

"They didn't come”.

Harry curls his eyebrows, Louis is looking down now. "No one from my family showed up at the game", Louis shakes his head again, his hair ends above his eyes but he doesn't bother to move it away.

Harry leaves the sandwich he is making on the counter of the kitchen. When he gets in front of Louis, he sees his eyes, they are _lost_ , maybe even a little empty. Louis pulls himself up to sit and Harry makes probably the most spontaneous decision he can make and wraps his arms around the older boy. Louis sinks his face into the crook of his neck and wraps his arms around Harry.

"Maybe they- they had a problem, and couldn't come".

"Lottie promised she would come, if they had a hitch they would have at least written me a good luck message before the game but they didn't. They just, forgot".

Harry probably holds him even tighter. He leaves a kiss on his forehead and whispers a small "I'm so sorry", his lips still brushing against his skin. They remain silent for a while, that's it, and Harry continues to stroke Louis' hair.

"Can you", Louis' small voice comes to his ears after endless minutes of silence, "Can you give me another one?" Harry looks at him for a moment, his fingers are still slowly stroking his hair. "Another kiss on the forehead, I mean".

Harry places another kiss on his skin, and Louis closes his eyes, following Harry's hands that are still on his hair with his head, "Another one, please?". Harry's lips stay a little longer on Louis' forehead this time, and when he pulls away he sees a smile on his lips.

"Thank you".

"Are you still hungry?" Louis nods with the same excitement as before, Harry laughs, and has to end that moment by letting go of Louis and getting up. This time Louis also gets up and follows him into the kitchen, sitting down in front of the kitchen counter where Harry has started to make him a sandwich with some things he found. "Here". Louis grabs the sandwich shyly, "Thank you".

"If you want you can stay for dinner, or as long as you want", Louis says another "Thank you" before eating his sandwich. They remain silent until Louis eats, when he finishes he gets up and takes the plate he has used to the kitchen sink.

Once he's beside Harry, he again brings his lips to the curly's skin, kisses him on the cheek and a few seconds later runs his tongue over it. He laughs when Harry pushes him away, trying to lick his cheek again, but Harry gets up and runs through the kitchen.

He continues to run for a while, but Louis, after grabbing something from the fridge, manages to grab him by the hips and spreads some cream on his face. "What the fuck! Where and when did you get that?", Louis just smiles, before spreading more cream on Harry's face. "You better run, Louis", Louis laughs again, but he actually starts running when Harry finishes wiping his face.

Louis is certainly faster than Harry, and although he doesn't know the house as well as the curly, he continues to be advantaged even when he walks out of a random door and finds himself in the garden. But when he runs out of breath and stops for a moment, Harry catches up.

They both fall, and Louis ends up under Harry, who has him pinned by the wrists. He tries to free himself from Harry's grasp, but the curly shakes his head and continues to keep him pinned. When Louis stops struggling, they look at each other for a second before they both burst out laughing, "Okay Harry, you won".

"Did you have any doubts?".

"Several, actually".

Harry rolls his eyes, and when he looks back at Louis he realizes how close their faces are. Not just their faces. Their bodies, even their heartbeats. Their eyes stay glued together for a while, their faces so close that their noses are almost touching, and Harry doesn't know how, but he finds himself looking at Louis' lips.

Louis also lowers his gaze to Harry's lips, and when the curly notices, his heart stops beating for a second.

_That's the moment, isn't it?_

He guesses it is.

Harry feels Louis' breath meld with his own, his heartbeat accelerating, and the boy underneath him isn't even fighting his grip anymore. So he starts to move closer to Louis' face, his eyes still glued to his lips, they are red, maybe he has bitten them too tightly between his teeth. Their noses collide, Harry has his eyes closed now, and maybe their lips are touching.

_That's the moment._

When his lips briefly touch Louis', Harry feels himself being lifted and a moment later his body is rolling on the grass beside Louis. As soon as he touches the grass he pulls himself up to sit and Louis does the same, but he doesn't direct his gaze at Harry at all, who instead remains staring at him until their eyes meet. And God, Harry wishes he can forget what he saw in Louis' eyes.

He opens his mouth to speak, even though he doesn't know what to say, what can he say? But Louis shakes his head and gets up, "I'm sorry". He enters the house again a second later, Harry remains staring at the door he came out of moments before while chasing Louis.

His mind can think of nothing, only emptiness, there is silence, a deafening silence. He continues to stare at the door, a part of him hopes that Louis will reappear, that he will go to him and kiss him, but his heart definitely breaks when he hears the engine start and Louis' car drive away.

_And I hope that you don't run from me._


End file.
